What's the difference between Neil Armstrong and Michael Jackson? Neil Armstrong WALKS on the moon. Michael Jackson rapes little boys

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What's green and has wheels? Grass I lied about the wheels

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Huffing glue only becomes a problem when you get stuck on it

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Why did the man cross the road? He was in a state of depression and chose to commit suicide.

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This Haiku is strange There is a dinosaur WOW Snuffleupagus

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Roses are red Violets are blue Tulips are yellow Grass is green

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What would you do for a klondike bar? Pay for it, eat it and then proceed on disposing the packaging of the klondike bar

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What does a homeless man get for Christmas? A gun to kill himself with

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What do you call two black people in the same sleeping bag? A newly married couple on their camping adventure honeymoon.

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A newly wed couple is at the beach and the wife asks for sunscreen and the man says he forgot it in the car. He goes to the car only to find that the car had been broken into. He goes to call his wife and they go back to the car only to find that the car had been stolen. #Turns out the thief broke the window to steal the car but saw the owner coming and hid behind a bush and upon the man going to call his wife he continued with his mission

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What do you call a poor man on the side of the rode asking for money? A poor man on the side of the rode asking for money.

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Why was 6 scared of 7? Because 7,8,9

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An alien spacecraft picks up human transmissions from Earth. They continue on in silence and disgust.

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what did the robot say to the centipede? "Stop being a centipede!" It's funny because the robot doesn't have any arms.

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Why did blonde cross the road? She needed to get to work.

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What's a black man that drives a bus? A bus-driver

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What does and elephant and me have in common. Everything, I am an elephant.

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Why do things made by Glen taste so good? Because he has mastered the cream

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How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? That's not funny.

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It is wrong to strip a homeless man of his clothes and chew his face off. Note to self: Explain this to someone before they have taken bath salts.

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haha women's rights.....what a joke.

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Q: What does a bunny and a plum have in common? A: They're both purple except the bunny.

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What did the the water hose say to the man? Nothing, but the sight of water made the man thirsty and he drank to excess and died from dilution of his blood.

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A horse walked into a bar. The bartender said "why the long face?" The horse then panicked, and feeling threatened, it kicked the bartender with its hind legs and galloped out of the bar. A civilian took immediate control of the situation and dialed the number for animal control, who arrived shortly and tranquilized the deer and put it back in its natural habitat. Don't worry, that didn't actually happen

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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