Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

A man walks into a doctor's office and says "Doctor, it hurts when I poke my leg like this!" The doctor replies "That because there's a knife in your hand."

thumb_up thumb_down -8

How do you make a girl scout cry? Kill her family.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Your dad must be a drug dealer because I saw him in your kitchen snorting cocaine

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Q: What would have been the easiest way to stop the second world war without killing anyone? A: Paid Hitler for his art.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Repeat after me: Silk, Silk, Silk, What's the square root of 465?

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What's the difference between a Jew and a Boy Scout? Boy Scouts come back from camp.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

A ham sandwich walks into a bar, bartender says "We don't serve food here."

thumb_up thumb_down -8

whats worse than finding a dead cat in your kitchen? a dead cat in your bedroom

thumb_up thumb_down -8

You: "Ask me if im an astronaut. " Them: "R u an astronaut?" You: "No. "

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What's worse than getting punched in the balls? Many things inflict more pain than that

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Knock knock Who's there? Isabelle Isabelle who? Isabelle Williams Oh hi Isabelle come in

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Who's the slut of the alphabet? C.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

That made no sense... Did you just call me sugartits Nero? Dont you have a wife?

thumb_up thumb_down -10

A horse walks into a bar The bartender says "why the long face?" The horse says nothing, because he's a horse The bartender soon relizes there is a horse in his bar, and calls animal control

thumb_up thumb_down -10

One day... Jack: Good morning Ben: Good morning The End.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

whats the difference between a mexican and a bench? a mexican has elbows.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Roses are red, violets blue, um... that's all i got.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

A terminte walks into a pub and ask is the bar tender here?

thumb_up thumb_down -10

So 2 apples are having sex, and one apple sais to the other, I got worms.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What did the towel say to the other towel? Nothing, there was no topic of conversation.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

saw a free cat yesterday...it was dead on the side of the road

thumb_up thumb_down -10

friends are like snowflakes. if you piss on them they go away

thumb_up thumb_down -10

A Texan, a Mexican, a Brit and a Frenchman are on a plane that begins having engine trouble. The black box was never found.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops