A detective? I think more about that chip and dale thing, that was not funny, the classics are okay I suppose, but that newer thing detective-ish maybe. Uh... Do I get a clue? I have not like watched all of them.

A man stumbles up to the only other patron in a bar and asks if he could buy him a drink. "Why of course," comes the reply. The first man then asks: "Where are you from?" "I'm from Ireland," replies the second man. The first man responds: "You don't say, I'm from Ireland too! Let's have another round to Ireland." "Of course," replies the second man. I'm curious, the first man then asks: "Where in Ireland are you from?" "Dublin," comes the reply. "I can't believe it," says the first man. "I'm from Dublin too! Let's have another drink to Dublin." "Of course," replies the second man. Curiosity again strikes and the first man asks: "What school did you go to?" "Saint Mary's," replies the second man, "I graduated in '62." "This is unbelievable!", the first man says. "I went to Saint Mary's and I graduated in '62, too!" About that time in comes one of the regulars and sits down at the bar. "What's been going on?" he asks the bartender. "Nothing much," replies the bartender. "The O'Kinly twins are drunk again."

What's the difference between a jew and a pizza? A pizza doesn't scream in the oven.

Roses are red Violets are blue, Eat my anus with a spoon.

What's worse then getting followed by a creepy man in a van? Getting followed and raped by a creepy man in a van.

what do you call a black guy with a bachelor's degree? by his first name, "Carl".

What's worse then 10 dead babies in 1 tree? 1 dead baby in 10 trees...

whats worse than having ice cream and not eating it? Being lactose intolerant

Do you know what the forest fire got for Christmas? Your house

What's brown and sticky? A black man covered in syrup.

When life gives you lemons squeeze them at people then run away.

What do Ethiopians do on Fridays? Starve.

What did the Farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where's my Tractor?"

I have an idea! You leave.

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

What did the black man drink on a hot summer day? Some water, it quickly replenished the liquids he was perspiring do to the temperature being sufficiently hotter than his body temperature

why didn't the donkey go to the party? Because, unfortunately he did not have the required linguistic skills to communicate with the person inviting. This is obviously dependent on whether the person who invited him was a human, if it was another donkey then perhaps this would of happened. However, this is also very unlikely as donkeys do not have parties or really communicate

What did the gay man die of? Obesity.

2 * 2 * 2 * 3 * 2417

Your momma is so dumb that her IQ is 3 standard deviations below that of an average person.

Knock knock Who's there? Doctor Doctor who? Doctor Adams. You called me about your father's stroke.

A man was struck by lightning. What did you think he got super powers or something? No. He died a horrible death

Why did the chicken cross the road? Who cares...he didn't make it anyways..

Why was the protester on the floor? Because the protest had become a riot, and police brutality is a serious issue.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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