What's white and sticky.... Jizz

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Roses are red Violets are blue classic

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Rap. Skate. Smoke.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

What did the Orange say to the Apple? Hi

thumb_up thumb_down -31

What did the pregnant 16 year old get for her birthday? A miscarriage

thumb_up thumb_down -31

I like to give help to people, expecting that they will be my slaves for life.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

What begins with "F" and ends in "uck"? There are multiple words or word combinations that begin with "F" and end in "uck," such as fat duck, so you dont need me to tell you, be creative.

thumb_up thumb_down -41

Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

thumb_up thumb_down -51

You walk into a plane full of Arabs talking about how much they hate America. You arrive at your destination enlightened about the problems in American society.

thumb_up thumb_down -55

How does an asian man drive? He hops into the car, turns the ignition, slowly accelerates from his parking spot and merges into everyday traffic

thumb_up thumb_down +40

What's worse than a bee sting? A large number of things ranging from getting stung by two bees to falling off a cliff.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Life is like the Titanic. You cruise along on course and everything is great -- until you hit an iceberg and 1,517 people die.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

what did the boy say when his friend was having a panic attack? "don't panic!" rather earnestly in the hope that his friend's breathing returned to normal as panic attacks can be very uncomfortable and place too great a strain upon the cardio and respiratory functions.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why did the woman have no boobs? Breast cancer

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What came first, the chicken or the egg? The chicken. The chicken always comes first, that's why the egg never comes at all.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

two peanuts were walking down the street one was assualted

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why DIDN'T the chicken cross the road? Because it got hit by a bus

thumb_up thumb_down +10

why didn't sue come to her son's baseball game? because he doesn't play baseball, he lost his arms in a horrible plane crash. besides, sue died in that accident anyway.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What is wrong with being a black Jew? You have to sit in the back of the oven.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did anna stop wanting to build a snowman? Beacuse she died of cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A young boy walked into a hardware store and asked for a long weight. Luckily, the shop owner was kindly and brought the child up to speed on the process of hazing.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why do you never want to party with Lindsay Lohan? Because she's a drug abuser and a terrible influence.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the monkey eat the banana? Because it was sexually confused

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Knock Knock. Who's There? I don't know. I'm paralyzed.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops