What do you call a man with no eyes? A hero for going to war and surviving being tortured by the Vietnamese.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Bob, your neighbor. Okay, come in.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Alzheimers, Cheese in toast,

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why were maddie and maddy and rachel and jill all friends? we all enjoy pizza

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A black man logs on to facebook. He checks his news feed then logs off

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Q: What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? A: Pfft. Stupid. Apples are for healthy people. Go for the ice cream. There's no worms in that.

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Q:What did the slut have in her mouth? A: teeth.

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*knock knock* i have diarrhea

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Q: What do you call a innocent black man that was shot 403 times by the cops when they asked for his ID and somehow assumed he was gonna reach for a gun? A: Deceased Texan.

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why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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Knock knock Who's there? John Oh hello John come on in mate.

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Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

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Knock, knock. MAN: Who's there? ... MAN: Hello? Anyone out there? ... MAN: Must be the wind.

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I dont often wash my hands in the bathroom but when i do its so people dont think im gross.

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Why couldn't the blond get into the library? Because the library was closed therefore the door was locked.

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Three blind mice go into a pub, but they are unaware of their surroundings so to derive humour from it would be exploitative.

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Hook a finger from each hand in your mouth, now pull so your lips are tight and try to say "I was born on a pirate ship" I'm sorry, I can hardly understand you.

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Ice cream rules kids are great how thinks of this? Michael Jackson

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What do you get if you put a baby in a blender? An Erection

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Why doesn't Lucinda have a penis? Because she's Mexican.

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What do you call a black man that steals a VCR? My Grandpa, he was a Vietnam vet

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knock knock who's there ?

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THis guy went into the bathroom with a girl in the middle of party and they started having sex but then the guy has to pee so he does... and then he leaves the bathroom and goes back to the party

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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