Why did sally fall out of the tree? Because sally was morbidly obese and uprooted the tree from underneath her subsequently causing her to splash violently on the ground. Why didn't sally get back up? Because the splash caused the earth to spin at 40000 rpm into the sun.

What did the farmer say to the chicken? Nothing, the farmer was arrested for having sex with a chicken.

An asian man walks into a bar and lights a cigarette. He is politely asked to leave due to smoking being prohibited indoors.

What's the difference between Paris Hilton and a cow? Cows are ruminants, meaning that they have a digestive system that allows use of otherwise indigestible foods by regurgitating and rechewing them as "cud". Paris Hilton, on the other hand, is a human being. Therefore, her stomach digests the bolus (masticated food) only after it has exited the oesophagus into the body of the organ, where it is digested into chyme and then passed through the pyloric sphincter into the duodenum.

What do you call a black midget in space? The first true example of how hard work, dedication and sacrifice can help you to achieve your goals.

Q:What did the slut have in her mouth? A: teeth.

why was six afraid of seven? because seven threatened to kill him and his family.

My spelling is horrible

Why didn't Santa deliver presents until the night after Christmas? You should go ask someone who knows.

What did the guy say to the other guy? Hello.

If you don't see banners here, it doesn't mean they are not there...

This man was known to beat his wife alot, To the car door to open it for her...

Q. Why do some people not like anti-jokes? A. They don't find the humor funny.

Thank you, you remind me that I am not insane, just because I believe we humans can accomplish more, by uniting as one, rather than fighting one another. I feel as if I belong somewhere else, yet the question remains always, are people such as you better, or are we relics from the past?

What looks like mud, smells like mud and eats mud? An African

Knock Knock Who's there? Jehovah Witness

knock knock... whos there? NOT BIN LADEN!

Alright so an elite group of Navy Seals walk into a mansion. They open fire on Osama Bin Laden and kill him.

Who threw beer on livvy barnett? Cam irwin.

Knock knock. Who's there? We are members of the church of Jesus Christ of latter day saints.

Why did the black man offer the girl flowers? It was his niece's birthday.

Potatoes have skin, i have skin, so therefore i must be a pig

Why is a bird when it flies? Because the higher it goes the much.

An asian walks into class to take a math test. He did not study and consistently misbehaves and promptly fails.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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