It works on whoever I have an emotional attachment with, for example people might be thinking you and I write in the exact same style, but I am actually copying your way of typing (spelling, word composition etc) this because we relate on a deep emotional level with people that like "get us" because they can act and behave like us. This again doubles the effect of the hypnosis, since when I get "super high on trance" and you feel that way, well, we both reach into the same wavelength, literally. Scientists and hypnotists supposedly have no idea as to why this happens, but I know, it is because our brain patterns are so similar, that even though we are at a long distance, your body believes itself to be an extension of mine and the other way around. How do I know this? Yogurt.

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Knock Knock Who's there? The police. Open up.

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Why did the mexican buy 50 tacos? Because he was taking them to the orphanage where he grew up. Isn't that nice?

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What did the boy with no parents get for Christmas from his Grampa? Nothing because his Grampa had alzheimer's disease -Flap

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot. You racist.

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I like to give help to people, expecting that they will be my slaves for life.

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What junk did she have in her trunk? Mcdonalds because shes fat as hell.

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I f*cked your mom last night and she liked it. 8====D~~~~

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Q: What present did the Taliban's wife get on the islamic holiday A: a beating

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Q: How did the black guy die? A: After a long battle with a terrible case of pneumonia he struggled to breath and died a slow and peaceful death... R.I.P. Dad

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What's the difference between an iPhone and a Samsung Galaxy? Google it, there are many differences.

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A rabi and a priest go out for a coffee they talk for a while and go on there way

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What is the similarity between Moses and Muhammad? They both have the same letter starting their names

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Whats worse than being out in the cold? Having cancer.

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A blind man walks into a bar. Nobody is surprised.

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A dog walks into a bar, followed by his blind owner.

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Q. How many alzhimers patients dose it take to screw in a light bulb? A. To get to the other side

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You can pick you're friends, you can pick you're nose, but you can't run over a pedestrian.

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Why did the Chicken cross the roead? It didn't

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What's worse than a bee sting? A large number of things ranging from getting stung by two bees to falling off a cliff.

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Why did Tim fall out of the window? Well... he didn't exactly fall... I pushed him

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what did the boy say when his friend was having a panic attack? "don't panic!" rather earnestly in the hope that his friend's breathing returned to normal as panic attacks can be very uncomfortable and place too great a strain upon the cardio and respiratory functions.

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What's the difference between a microwave and hamster? They're both furry except for the microwave

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I still remember the last thing my grandfather said before he kicked the bucket. He said: "Hey, I wonder how far I can kick this bucket."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops