Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? She didn't own a car.

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What do you do with a wombat? Allow it to freely express instinctive behaviour in its natural habitat.

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Knock knock. whos their! Grammar police. We'd like to have a little chat.

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Lasers are red, Tasers are blue, and I will use them, to kill you!

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Woman + Kitchen = sandwich

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What did the parents say to their kid? You're adopted and we don't love you.

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A homophobic man walks into a bar and the bartender asks: "what can I get for ya?" the man replies: "shut up gaylord"

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You can lead a horse to water, but you can't suck its dick.

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your so fat. your fat!

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Why do things made by Glen taste so good? Because he has mastered the cream

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Man: Excuse me sir, is this where I turn in my library book? Farmer: You must be really lost, this is a farm.

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What do you call white people on a bench? NBA What do you call black people on a bench? RTA

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96 right now there mad at each other but pretty soon it will look like this 69

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A black man walks into a bar. The bartender, upon seeing him, asks him to leave. The black man is enraged by the blatant racism shown by this man, and proceeds to punch the bartender repeatedly. After 5 minutes of non-stop punching the man stops, looks at his victim, and is filled with remorse. He is dead. Upon looking around, the black man notices scaffolding and building equipment scattered around the room. He falls to the ground as he realizes the bar is still under construction, and unable to serve customers this early in development. The bartender was simply asking the man to leave for his own safety.

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A man walks into a bar. Sup.

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what does a slim jim taste like? there is no answer because everyone has a different amount of taste buds

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If anyone has a KIK, put it in the comments.

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A seal walks into a club. And proceeds to die. Why? The seal isn't able to walk so it was crawling and a man was swinging a club to it's head, so it perished and he could feed his family. The Statement was censored by the FCC

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Yo momma so old some said act ur age and she dies

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Why did the penis cross the road? Because a man was humping the chicken

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why did the chicken cross the road? IDGAC

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Why couldn'nt Sally swing on the swing? Because Sally was a carrot

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How does Steven Hawkings refresh after a long day of work? F5

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how do you get a nun pregnant? have unprotected SEX with her, resulting in expulsion from her convent

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops