Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the lesbian's house. Knock knock. Who's there? The chicken.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, when the bass droped, my balls did too.

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Q: Whats more funny than a pile of dead babies? A: The one in the center eating its way out

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Lollies are sweet warheads are sour, open your legs and feel my power

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Black, I dont know if you are kidding around or something, but I cant reach you on the phone pal, I am really sorry about the Valium, it was like only 10 milligrams pal, I mean please man, it was a joke, and Ill break up with Line anyways, I mean Alex and Petter are sorry too okay? Just take the phone, ill be there soon, I mean come on, you are the most cruel person I know, lets talk about it

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Why did the boy have to ride the bus? Because both his parents died.

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My house is on fire I'll probably die posting this joke

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A kid walks into a bar and the bartender yells, "Get Out!"

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What's wet and pink? Bubblegum!

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I'm called the! no i wish am I left

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A baby seal walks into a club. It is eventually beaten to death and eaten.

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there are two muffins in an oven one muffin says "whoa, its hot in here!" the other says nothing, because it is a muffin, and the other muffin, in reality, said nothing either.

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? That is not nearly as important as how to cure cancer so let's not worry about it.

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What happened to the boy with no family? He died in a tragic car accident along with his family

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What's the difference between Jam and Jelly? You can't Jelly your dick into your girlfriend's ass.

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What do you call a bird that can't fly? an ostrich

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A jewish man walks into a bar has a drink, then walks out of the bar.

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A plane crashes on the border of canada and america, where do you bury the survivors? I lied there are no survivors and the bodies were incinerated by burning jet fuel so theres nothing to bury.

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What do you call a black man in a suit and tie? Presumably affluent

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Why was the baby crying? He had just witnessed his parent get brutally murdered.

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Your mums so tall, she's above the average height of women for her age.

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Knock knock. Its open.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead... Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first monkey... Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Because he thought it was a game...

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What do you call a man with a spade stuck in his head? An ambulance, he may be in need of urgent medical assistance

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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