A little boy is going to school when he is stopped by a stranger. The stranger tells the little boy, when his teacher asks him why he is late, just say willytop. The boy looks at the stranger oddly, but proceeds to go to school. He arrives 5 minutes late, and is teacher isn't that happy. His teacher asks him why he is late. All the boy says is Willytop. The teacher looks at him horrified, and sends him to the office. Well, the boy arrives in the principals office, and the principal asks him why he was sent down. All the boy said was Willtop. The Principal was so horrified that he expelled the boy from school. Well, the boy went home, to find his parents in the living. They told the boy they knew he was expelled, but they wanted to know why. All the boy said was Willytop. The parents were so horrified by this that they kicked him out of the house. Well, the boy is now walking to dark town streets, when he is stopped by a cop. The cop asks him why he is walking the streets alone. All the boy says is Willytop. The cop is so disgusted, that he kicks the boy out of town. Well, the boy is now sitting in a bar, and the bartender asks him why he is alone. All the boy said was Willytop. The bartender looked at him horrified, but before the bartender could say anything, the boy says "Please sir, I was kicked out of school, my house and even my hometown because of willytop. what does it mean sir?" The bartender nods, and tells the boy to come with him across the street, because if he tells him in the bar, the other people may get mad. Well, the boy and the bartender are across the street from the bar. The bartender opens his mouth, but before he could speak, a drunk driver hits them both.

I dont often wash my hands in the bathroom but when i do its so people dont think im gross.

why did the mexican steal the money? because he was financially struggling and needed the money to support his family

THis guy went into the bathroom with a girl in the middle of party and they started having sex but then the guy has to pee so he does... and then he leaves the bathroom and goes back to the party

roses are blue violets are blue everything is blue I'm sad now

Yo momma so ugly..... what more do you want

Hook a finger from each hand in your mouth, now pull so your lips are tight and try to say "I was born on a pirate ship" I'm sorry, I can hardly understand you.

What's the same about a clown and a knife? They are both fun, except for the clown. I hate clowns.

Ice cream rules kids are great how thinks of this? Michael Jackson

What's the difference between a Jew and a Boy Scout? Boy Scouts come back from camp.

A: Knock knock. B: Come in. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ?cash(p)

knock knock whose there? you have AIDS

There was a blonde driving a car but she was late to a meeting so she started speeding but then a police officer pulls her over. The officer asked the blonde "Do you know how fast you were going?" to which the blonde responded "Yes, I am late to a meeting" so the police gives a ticket for speeding and she ends up going late to her meeting.

What is the difference between a jew and a boyscout? A boyscout comes home from camp.

Knock Knock, Who's there? Duck, Duck who? Duck Sandwich

A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks: dude, what happened to your eye? The man replies: abuse.

I painted my dog to look like pizza. Someone ate him. It was my mom.

What is the difference between a urologist and a can of chili? One is hot and spicy, and the other analyzes urine.

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

What's worse than missing your flight? 9/11

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Why was OJ Simpson's knife covered in blood? Because he just murdered his wife.

2 penguins in a tub. one looks to the other an says, "pass the bar of soap." the other looks at him.."what do you think i am, a typewriter?"

knock knock. who's there? no one. no one who? no one who?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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