Why was the student late for class? Because paraplegics can't drive.

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Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? Skeletons neither have muscles nor brains to control any muscles and therefor cannot transport themselves across a road or any stretch of land for that matter.

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Your mmma is so stupid when we said the drinks were in the house. She went looking for them!

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What's worse than falling off a horse? Falling off a cliff.

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Knock Knock Who's There? The I.R.S.

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What did the black guy say when after he jumped in the pool? Wow, its kinda chilly.

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catastrophic anthropogenic global warming

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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Why'd the littler girl fall of the swing? because a drunk driver ran through the swing, the little girl was killed. he was later charged with manslaughter.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Which is rather deceiving, Considering that the name 'violet' should naturally insinuate that the object it is describing is violet as well. Violet as a color is generally a deep shade of purple. Therefore, shouldn't the aforementioned plant, the 'violet', be violet in color as opposed to the blue color that is most widely accepted by the general populous?

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Why did the cookie go to the hospital? It had cancer.

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Your momma's so fat, diet and exercise would probably save her life!

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Two nerds walk into a bar. The effects of alcohol do not discriminate based upon the social status of said consumer.

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What's funny and old? I really do'nt know

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What is black white and red all over? A zebra which a lion did not finish eating.

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What do airplanes and trees not have in common?? Bananas

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what is the only thing in the world that can pick up 1000 jews at once? A vacuum cleaner

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Two fish walked into a bar. They died. Because fish can't breathe out of water.

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How does a doctor wake up in the morning He opens his eyes

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A blind man walks in a bar I mean like a metal bar But it didn't hurt He only laught

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a man walks into a bar, it hurt.

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Potassium? K.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "why the long face?" The horse does not answer because he is a horse, and neither speaks nor understands the english language. He looks around, and is confused by his surrondings. He gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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