How do you stop a baby from crawling in circles? Pick it up and put it in a crib, like a responsible parent.

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Truth is Jordan Abu aita has a hairy @ss

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i had a dream last night;) it was sad because you lived but then i dreamed up a bus and made it hit you. i had a dream last night;) you died

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who do you call those who give this joke a thumbs down? people

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I remember my first beer. It did not taste good to me at the time.

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The Chicken was crossing the road one afternoon, he was fined by a police officer for J walking He made it to the other side.

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An egg and a sausage walk into a bar, and the barman says "sorry, we don't serve breakfast".

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Yo mama's so fat that when she went to go get an x-ray, they had to use the one they have at the zoo.

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what did the duck say to the other duck Quack

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a blonde, brunette and a red head are all goin to jump off a bridge and turn into something. the brunette jumps and says fish, and she turns into a fish. the red head says eagle and bacomes an eagle. the blonde gets a running start, but then trips on the way off and she says shit and turns into shit.

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What do you call a bunch of white people walking down a cliff? Avalanche

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Q. What happened to the man that kept an open hand? A. He is in jail because he beat his family

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why was the man denied his teaching job? because he is a wanted cerial killer in 43 states.

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Why wasn't the cab driver sent to prison after bombing the school? It was a suicide bombing.

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How do you make a clown stop laughing? Hit him in the face with an ax.

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What is green and red and is going super fast? A frog in a blender.

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What's the worst part about a plane with 500 people in it crashing? It might leave a dent in the ground.

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Q: why did the black guy die? A: he got shot

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BAr intO a wAlks… sorry I wrote that joke after walking out of a bar.

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whats long and black on a black guy slavery

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The world does not deserve our rule, it requires effort, teamwork, respect for oneself and others, tolerance, love, patience, strength, honor, loyalty... ...Face it, people do this because it is far easier to be ruled, than to rule, it is far easier to do as told, than to ask oneself what one desires with ones life. A king that suffers the burden of his people, falls of his throne, a king that enjoys the burdens of his people, creates burden, and grows as people suffer. We cannot change that, maybe we have yet to evolve to that point as humans, or maybe it is time to accept, that we have evolved past this.

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Why is the baby not crying? Because it died of herpes. JUST KIDDING! Babies can't get herpes.

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Why Did the throw up He was sick

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At the Asthma hotline. Caller: Aahhh aahhh *gasp* *gasp* I need you... Woman: *slams phone* DAMN I WISH THESE PERVERTS WOULD STOP CALLING!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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