Q: what did the emo girl use to check her email? A: A computer.

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How many Jews does it take to change a light bulb? Three. One to change the light bulb and two to file a lawsuit.

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A blonde walks out of a hair salon She had just dyed her hair.

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Why was the little boy hit by a bus? I pushed him

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How do you kill a priest? Shoot him in the forehead.

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Q: How do you make a fireman cry?? A: Drown his wife

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how do u get the baby to stop choking? take ur dick out of its mouth!!!

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What happened to the black man when he was hit by a truck? He died.

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Whats is worse than a dog bite? A shark bite. Whats worse than a shark bite? The Holocaust.

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On Wednesday night, a drunk man was walking on the cliffs of dover. his funeral was saturday.

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Incidentally,on the subject of friends, when do you actually classify someone as a friend? Is it: When you have been to each others' house; When you have had an intelligent conversation more than once; When you have stayed for dinner; Or perhaps simply when each has decided that the other is worth the air that they breathe? [L]

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1. Look at the size of his putter. 2. Oh, dang, my shaft's all bent. 3. You really wacked the hell out of that sucker. 4. After 18 holes I can barely walk. 5. My hands are so sweaty I can't get a good grip. 6. Lift your head and spread your legs. 7. You have a nice stroke, but your follow through leaves a lot to be desired. 8. Just turn your back and drop it. 9. Hold up. I've got to wash my balls. 10. Damn, I missed the hole again.

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What is small, cries a lot, and moves at high speeds? A baby stapled to a car.

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What did Rachel (the columbine girl) get for her birthday?? Nothing she's dead.

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Q:why did jimmy fall of a swing? A:Because someone threw a fridge at him

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What did Oprah get for christmas? Weight Watchers

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A child rides his bike down the sidewalk and stops at an intersection. He looks both ways, then crosses the road. What was he looking for? His family.

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Q. How does Michael Jackson pick his nose? A. From a catalogue.

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dont insult justin bieber, she has feelings too!

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So a girl says "I want to be a banana when I grow up". She's set unrealistic goals and her parents fear she may be autistic.

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Your momma;s so fat she stepped on the scale and said one at a time please!

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What's worse than stepping in tar? Getting your face ripped off by a man sized Tarantula

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What do you call a black prostetut with braces. A black and decker pecker wrecker

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A boy got scratched by a dog and nearly killed him. When he grew up, a dog came running up to him and started biting and scratching him till he couldn't handle it. Then a plane crashed into him and he died.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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