Why did the orphans kill timmy? timmy said a your mom joke.

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What do you call a mexican who works at a landscaping business? A hard working man who is trying to provide money for his family

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u are so............................................................................................................................................................................................gay

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Why did the chicken cross the playground. He didn't. chickens are unsanitary to have in schools

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What do you call a duck who votes democrat? A duck

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How do you make a baby understand what you want? You color yourself purple, wear a yellow shirt, and do cart wheels while singing "The wheels on the bus go 'round and 'round!"

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people who spank you sure are a pain in the ass.

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How much wood could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? A wood chuck could chuck as much wood as a wood chuck would if a wood chuck could chuck wood.

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Why couldn't the man ever reach his dream of becoming a professional athlete? He was pronounced with Alzheimer at a young age and could never remember his dream the next day.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she has no arms. *Knock knock* "Who's there?" "Not Sally."

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A man walks in to a bar, and the Bartender says "Why the long face?" The man replies "My wife is dying of Terminal Cancer".

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Roses are red Violets are blue Im really bad at poetry Your mums a whore

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How do you cut the sea in half? You can't. There are an odd amount of letters. You would have to jeopardize the "e", but then it would no longer be "sea".

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Two muffins are in an oven. Neither of them talk due to the fact that they are muffins and are inanimate, therefore denying them the ability to talk.

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what do you call a boomerang that doesn't work? a stick

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Q: What do you call an Ethiopian on a food strike? A: An Ethiopian

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I have a dirty joke. Poop.

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Why did the girl fall off the stage? Someone shot her.

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Why couldn't Billy see the show? Because Billy is blind.

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Man: Am i going to be alright? Doctor: No, you're going to die.

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What did the fish say after it's head was cut off? Nothing, it was a fish.

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A man walks into a meat shop. Man: I bet you $20 you can't reach the meat on the top shelf. Butcher: The steaks are too high

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Q: What does Jerry Sandusky and bills have in common? A: They both come in the mail

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An old friend of mine had an idea. "Socks, but for your hands." I laughed until the day I heard he died of chaffed penis.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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