Officer i'm dot nrunk, beriously you gotta selieve me!

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How many blondes can you fit in a car? About 5 if you lift the arm rest.

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Whats the difference between a black baby and a white baby? 15 minutes in the oven.

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A piece of paper got wet. I stuck it over the fireplace to dry off, but it lit on fire.

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How do you make Lady Gaga cry? Make hurtful and upsetting remarks about her person.

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A man had two kids who he loved very much but would always come home in a bad mood. On a Friday after returning home, he tells his wife, "I hate my life," then proceeds to take his anger out on her. If you were expecting for this to be a joke, then you clearly have some messed up humor. Abuse in the household isn't to be taken lightly.

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What did the soldier get for his birthday? Shot in the face.

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joe paterno doesn't walk into a police station

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Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? Because her mother inadvertently left the gate open while gardening.

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why did the teacher quit her job and become a musician? Because her class was very mean to her and growing up she had always wanted to play music

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead......

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How many Cancer patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One. Cancer does not affect one's ability to install light bulbs.

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what does pedobear get for christmas ? nothing he's the one giving love to all kids .

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When life gives you melons you may be dyslexic.

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why was six afraid of seven? it's a long story, and six doesn't want to talk about it.

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Why was the mushroom invited to the party? It was because it was a mushroom costume party

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What did the blonde call her pet zebra? Isaac

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13 =B you just learned something

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What did the doctors tell the boy with cancer who is on his way to being released from the hospital? "you are going to die," why give him hope and be proved wrong. This way if they are wrong the whole situation is a miracle, if they are right..... "I told you so"

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gingers

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Stripper went to strip club to ask for work. - It was closed

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Why did Suzie's friend put rubbish in her mouth? Because Suzie is a rubbish bin.

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If atheism is a religion, then not collecting stamps is a hobby.

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"Good Morning, I'm Dr. Pepper" "Like the drink?" "Huh... yes... just like the drink" Would you mind to sit right here Mr..... "Nike" "Oh, just like the shoes" "How do you dare!"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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