Bill: My brother died on 9/11 Steve: Oh, I'm so sorry to hear that. Was he in one of the towers? Bill: Both. Steve: Both? Bill: Well, he was in the first tower when the first plane hit, so he ran over warn everybody in the second tower. While he was in the second tower, he died of AIDS. Steve: LOL! Bill: Quit your laughing, Steve, and make sweet, sweet love to me! Steve: It would be my pleasure! (While Bill and Steve made sweet, sweet love on a park bench, little did they know that a hundred miles away in a beautiful Los Angeles home, actor Jeff Goldblum was making himself a turkey sandwich with extra mayonnaise)

A very rich man had a daughter whom all of the men in town wanted to marry her for wealth. Except there was one man who wanted to marry her due to his love for her. The father let his daughter marry whomever she wanted from all of the men in town, and she chose a man named Wilson Fremblington who wanted to marry her for wealth, because he was physically fit and overall a friendly man.

Why was little Alice and her family at the graveyard? Well someone had to come at her funeral...

What's brown, sticky, green, yellow, and orange that rides a unicycle? I have no clue, that's why I asked.

Why did'nt the puppy eat it's food? Because it was made up of little bits and peices of it's family.

Once there was an egg by the name of Steve. His name was Steve the Egg.

Q How do you make the fire fighter sad? A Kill his dog

Lets just say, that I can tell anyone that my brother is one of the top leaders for Interpol (here in the nation we reside in) and that while I do not have the required education to work for interpol, I have connections with them, which allows me to work, well... Yeah, Central.

I saw a number three walking past me in the street the other day and I thought to my self that's odd.

Wanna hear a joke? Womens rights ;) Wanna hear another joke? Too bad i'm not gonna tell you

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was commiting suicide

Why didn't Michael J. Fox feel the Virginia earthquake? He was on vacation in Maui.

How do you get someone to paid attention to etys You don't, there is no such thing as retys

Why did the chicken cross the road. grass was greener on the other side!

How do you make a kids parents mad? Fly an SR71-BLACKBIRD into him.

A Buddhist priest, and mexican drug lord, and a 12 year old girl walk into a bar. The bartender looks at the little girl and says. "Honey, you're too young to be in here." the little girl looks around and says. "Oh, My mistake." and leaves.

What would you do if Spider Man gave you super powers like his? Nothing. Spider Man is not real therefore you are most likely dreaming and need to wake up soon.

Why did the black man bleed to death? He was stabbed, but he bled to death because his doctor had just prescribed him some blood-thinners for his serious headaches.

Q: Why did Captain Kirk suck his own dick? A: Nobody else was around, I guess.

Boy: Hey girl if I had hand-cuffs, I’d lock myself to you right now! Girl: I would find that extremely creepy.

Why did the doctor not make it to his appointment in time? Because he died in 9/11!

what did the cat say to the dog? I turded out my crap hole

Why didn't Suzie answer her mother? Suzie has a serious condition where she is mute and also severely deaf.

Why are lawers are so scared of Jerry bryant? Because he bites

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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