Why was the doctor unable to perform his surgery properly? Because he forgot his scalpel

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You're a big fat monkey.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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What do you get when you cross an ugly hobo and a diabetic? Don't talk about your mom like that.

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Roses are red Violets are blue There's suppose to be a fourth line.

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Why did the cookie go to the doctor? Because he was eaten alive!!!

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the water? You shouldn't call him anything. He needs help. -Tag

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did Michael Jackson touch children ? yes of course. otherwise he would have been an absolutely terrible father

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whats a funny joke? nuthing nuthing at all

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Why did Johnny play piano with one hand? Because he lost his other one in a mining accident when he was 10. Johnny lives in rural Perú so he had to support his 6 younger brothers and sisters by working in a child factory.

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How do you put 100 kids on a girls face ? skeet

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In America you read books, but in Soviet Russia, it's exactly the same as it is in America, because it's not possible for books to read humans.

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I went to church.. i didn't get raped. I went to school... I didn't get raped. I went into a back alley... I didn't get raped. I went home... I didn't get raped. Today was better than yesterday...

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WARNING: this is a black joke Why does everybody hate darth vader? he is all black

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WWII veteran screamed! "You damn yellow monkey!!!" "But sir... ...my fur is brown!" Replied the monkey.

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A man walks off the top of a very tall building. Why did he fall off? Because he was blind

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God is real.

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roses are red violets are blue i have Alzheimers but at least i do not have Alzheimers

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The Below statement is an antijoke. The Above statement is a joke.

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Sometimes I wonder, "Why is the Frisbee gettiing bigger and bigger and bigger.." Then it hits me.

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A baby is cold and won't drink it's milk It's dead

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she was deaf, dumb, and mentally retarded; you sexist fiend.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Not only did 7 have that intimidating look to him, but 6 had recently found out that he was a well known mob boss who also went by the name of Lucky Seven. he was in charge of a gang called The Prime Numbers. They had been terrorizing 6's city for sometime now, whether it was stealing, mugging, or even killing or vandalism. 6 sure had a lot to fear, but he knew things might turn out well, as 6 had a great ability to try his best and do what he believed in: Justice

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Q: What's big, green, fuzzy, and will kill you if it falls out of a tree? A: A pool table.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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