Why can't Michael Jackson play chess? He's dead.

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Roses are black. Violets are black. Black people are black, And you're a douche.

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A black man and a hispanic man are in a car. Who is driving? The guy who didn't call shotgun.

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Why did the asian man crash? He fell asleep after a long 18 hour day of driving, plus he was listening to soothing soul music.

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Knock. Knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Are you mentally handicapped? Bananas are fruit.

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Did you know that you can drink lava? You can only do it once though.

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A duck walks into a bar. The bartender asks the duck "What'll it be?" The duck doesn't respond because it's a duck and it can't talk.

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What do you call Anne Franks life? A big game of hide and go seek.

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Why did the old man lose his cane? He didnt. He had alzheimers

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Roses are red Oranges are orange Nothing rhymes with orange Forever alone

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Q: What did the homless man get for chritsmas? A: Frostbite

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What did the man say to his wife while having sex? I don't know.

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What's worse than a pile of dead babies? People that make dead baby jokes.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. ( to heaven )

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What about the cool kids down the block. Their friend just died with a serious health condition.

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Why did the communist fail his history class? Because he didn't study hard enough.

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I love bacon therefor I love people who eat bacon execpt people who eat my bacon then I hate people who eat bacon

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Damn, I was gonna do my laundry but Amanda Todd drank all my bleach

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Why from a friends phone? I demand a full explanation, here, you got my number, you got my home address, and who the hell was that crying little bitch on the phone? I got friends in the UK which owe me some money, and nothing to lose, if I have to take care of you before you take care of me and even possibly my wife in the crossfire, I will take you down and everything in my path! Moral: Got ya!.

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what do u say to a man walking down the street nothing, u shouldnt talk to strangers

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: I didn't get to ask. He got hit by a car.

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when nothing goes right go left because if you go straight you will fall off the cliff

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What do you call a horse with two legs? A kangaroo

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Your mom is soo fat that when God said "let there be light" he had to ask her to move

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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