How many men does it take to change a lightbulb? One

what do you get when you cross a jellyfish, a jar, and a brown crayon? i dont know, im not into genetics, and jars dont have genes.

Knock Knock. Who's there? Boo. Boo who? No I said Lou. Oh hey Lou come on in.

What did the cat say to the rabbit? Nothing, cats are incapable of human speech as far as scientists are concerned. Also, the mouse was having a bad day. Rutabaga.

Q: why do orphans always go hard? A: because the can never go home.

Wanna hear a joke? Women's Basketball

Whats worse than the holocaust A: not much

What's worse then falling up the stairs? Ketchup

Why'd the chicken cross the road? To visit the graves of his wife and only daughter who were killed in a car accident at the fault of a drunk driver many years prior.

why was the pineapple bullied at school? cuz it was a pineapple duhhhhhhh

Why was the Mexican man in the rich man's garden? Because he enjoys flowers.

What's worse than having a retarded baby? Not having a baby

Why should you never push a Mexican off a bike? Because he will file a lawsuit against you in the event of an injury.

Two Muffins are in an oven the first Muffin says "whew it's hot in here." The other Muffin turns around and yells "Holy shit! I can talk too!"

There were 50 koreans; half of them liked gangnam style but the other half didn't. Why didn't the other half like gangnam style? They were north koreans.

If i wanted your 2 cents i'd rob you

the elephant asks the man, " how do u breathe out of that thing?" the man proceeds to explain to the elephant how he breathes out of his nose.

whats worse than nailing 8 babies to 8 trees? nailing 1 baby to 8 trees.

What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? We are both lawyers.

what do you get when you cross a red snugulo and a blue glurga? your on acid

why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible to try out for his school's football team. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

steven hawking walks into a bar

Q: Why was the old man sad? A: Because he has a quarter super glued to the bottom of his foot

You idiot.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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