A man is driving the speed limit of 55 on the highway. He gets pulled over and the cop says, "Do you know how fast you were going sir?" The man replies "Well yes I was going 55, the speed limit." The cop says, "No you were going 80." The speedometers broken.

How many anti jokes can you make from one joke? 1. 2. 3. 4. 5. 6. 7. 8. 9. 10. 11. 12. 13. 14. 15. 16. 17. 18. 19. 20. 21. 22. 23. 24. 25. 26. 27. 28. 29. 30. 31. 32. 33. 34. 35. 36. 37. 38. 39. 40. 41. 42. 43. 44. 45. 46. 47. 48. 49. 50. And so on.

Knock Knock Sadly the old woman was death and didn't hear the door knock.

A guy walks into a doctor's office and says: "Doctor! Doctor! You gotta help me! One day I'm a teepee, and the next day I'm a wigwam, and then the next day I'm a teepee, and then the next day I'm a wigwam again. The doctor says: Sir, we've been over this 100 times! You have stage 4 pancreatic cancer...

why did the baby fall down the steps? Because there was big earth quake that blocked his parents on the other side of the house, therefor leaving no one capable of getting to him befor falling

A dog was dying on the side of the road. I drove 50 meters ahead and saw it again. I was on shrooms.

I went to church.. i didn't get raped. I went to school... I didn't get raped. I went into a back alley... I didn't get raped. I went home... I didn't get raped. Today was better than yesterday...

A kid comes across an injured duck near a lake. Nevermind he doesn't see it he's really high.

Q:the is a mexican and a black guy in the car who id driving? A:the cop

How can you get a handicap black man to walk again? You don't...... Unless you motivate him with fried chicken. Anti-anti-joke!

Whats the difference between Osama and Obama? The S is replaced with a B.

Why did the bus crash? The driver was a loaf of bread.

What is green, has four legs, and if it falls out of a tree and onto your head, it will kill you? A pool table.

Why are asians bad drivers? Driving schools in asia are severely less developed and therefore produce less experienced and skillful drivers. They also have asian eyes (:

I like my coffee like i like my women ... With big titys

A fish didn't walk into a bar, because fish cannot walk.

You know what's funnier than 24? 25

so today, i was walking along, and i noticed that it was sunny outside.

How do you hack into someone's computer? A few good hits with a hatchet should do the trick

Yo momma so old that she has started to look into an affordable life insurance plan to ensure all her final expenses are taken care of.

why did a guy try to rob me? because he was black.

A man dies from a cat attack. he goes up to heaven. At the gates, St. Peter asks him, " how did you die sir?" The man doesn't reply so Peter says, "cat got your tongue?" "No," he says, "cat got my throat!"

Why is Skrillex bad at fishing? Because he always increases the treble input in his songs, and he doesnt have a rod.

What's the difference between a bowling ball and a sorority girl? You could always eat the bowling ball if you really had to.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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