how did the kid cut open his forehead? by putting on his underwear!

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Wanna hear a joke? Women's Basketball

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Who ever invented the "Knock- Knock jokes" should get a "No-bell prize"

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Your mother is so obese that she has over the recommended daily calorie intake on a regular basis.

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Knock knock *I need to either stop masturbating or answer the door* He's probably masturbating. *Who's there?* The other guy left. The end.

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A guy walks into a psychiatrist's office covered only in Saran Wrap. He asks the doctor, "The strip of metal teeth is missing from the box, so could I borrow your scissors?"

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What did the lady say after she returned home from the grocery store? "Oh no! I forgot the milk!"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken was trying to escape from the sad and depressing environment that surrounded him on the side he thus came from. Alas, he did not know that he would be soon hit by a drunk truck driver, who would also die, in a bright explosion of morbid flames and screams.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why would the chicken cross a road

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One day, a mother was talking with her three daughters. "Mommy," the first one asked, "Why did you name me Daisy?" "Because when we took you home, a daisy petal fell on your head." "Mommy," the second one said, "Why did you name me Rose?" "Because when we took you home, a rose petal fell on your head." "MMMMBBBWWAAAAAAAAAGGGGGHHHHH!" the third daughter cried. She was born with severe cognitive damage and is incapable of coherent speech.

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Chuck Norris walks up to a baby and punches it in the face He walks away and laughs

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So Bob walked into his house after a long day at work and layed a rope on his bed. A few hours later his wife came home and found a beautiful tire swing in their backyard but her husband shot him self in his throat.

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Why did the chick cross the road? Because she's a gold digger homie, dat chick is greedy like a mofo. She be all up in your grill and sheit tryin' getchu to spend your money lik dat homie ditch dat hoe, she aint even worth it brotha.

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What did the librarian say to the rude man who was talking very loudly? The librarian said "shhh keep it down."

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What's the difference between a goat and a cherry? You can't put a goat on top of your ice cream.

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Sigh, everybody in the world hates me :( Moral: Seven billion people? Realy?

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Why did it take a long time to read the anti-joke? Because of the great amount of space between the question and the answer.

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What's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish? One is a bottom-feeding scum sucker, and the other is an advisor who assists people by representing them on legal matters.

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Who cut the cheese? It's sliced so evenly.

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whats the difference between a black man and a cat? you dont run from a cat

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Want to hear a funny story? So, these to kids have cancer...

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Why does no one like fat people? Because of Jesse Ziegenbein

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-The proceeding statement is true. -The preceeding statement is false.

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a very large and muscly guy walks into a bar and finds a scrawny white guy he asks him if he has ever been in a fight with someone bigger then him the man says no the large man then leaves the bar and they both continue on with their day

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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