What's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish? One is a bottom-feeding scum sucker, and the other is an advisor who assists people by representing them on legal matters.

Why did the chick cross the road? Because she's a gold digger homie, dat chick is greedy like a mofo. She be all up in your grill and sheit tryin' getchu to spend your money lik dat homie ditch dat hoe, she aint even worth it brotha.

Q: what's red and covers an elementary school wall? A: a red crayon

A man walks into a bar........ gets eaten by a lion.

whats the hardest answer ever? The one without a question.

A black guy, a Mexican, an Arab and a white guy walk into a room and embrace cultural diversity.

What did the prizon cell mate get for christmas. Herpes!

A black and a white man walk into a grocery store the black man buys fried chicken and the white man buys vegtables. The men both have different opions and enjoy different food groups.

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? Pizzas were meant to be put in an oven.

If there's something strange in your neighborhood. Who ya gonna call? The Police.

The biggest lie ever. "I do" -Kim Kardashian

Whats the difference between a truck full of bowling balls and a truck full of dead babies? You can't unload one with a pitchfork

A muslim man takes a flight to New York. He lands safely at JFK airport.

steven hawking walks into a bar just kidding he has a horrable disiese preventing him from walking

What happened to the gay guy? He died of aids...

Roses are red Violets are blue I suck at poems nice tits

What do u firmly grasp and stroke until u can't go any longer? A shakeweight....

A guy walks into a psychiatrist's office covered only in Saran Wrap. He asks the doctor, "The strip of metal teeth is missing from the box, so could I borrow your scissors?"

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken was trying to escape from the sad and depressing environment that surrounded him on the side he thus came from. Alas, he did not know that he would be soon hit by a drunk truck driver, who would also die, in a bright explosion of morbid flames and screams.

So Bob walked into his house after a long day at work and layed a rope on his bed. A few hours later his wife came home and found a beautiful tire swing in their backyard but her husband shot him self in his throat.

One day, a mother was talking with her three daughters. "Mommy," the first one asked, "Why did you name me Daisy?" "Because when we took you home, a daisy petal fell on your head." "Mommy," the second one said, "Why did you name me Rose?" "Because when we took you home, a rose petal fell on your head." "MMMMBBBWWAAAAAAAAAGGGGGHHHHH!" the third daughter cried. She was born with severe cognitive damage and is incapable of coherent speech.

What did the lady say after she returned home from the grocery store? "Oh no! I forgot the milk!"

Chuck Norris walks up to a baby and punches it in the face He walks away and laughs

Why did the chicken cross the road? Why would the chicken cross a road

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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