In the North people say "once upon a time." What do people in the South say? "Y'all never gonna believe dis shit!"

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Now that we got our colors straight. Hey, how ya doin?

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what's worse than 10 dead babies in one trash can? 1 baby in ten trash cans

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Have you heard about the Polish princess? There isn't one. The Polish monarchy was abolished in 1918.

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Last Christmas I gave you my heart. I am still waiting for a transplant.....

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What did the... Uh, I forgot the rest of the joke.

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Q: Why couldn't the blonde add 10 and seven on a calculator? A: She couldn't find the 10 key.

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What's white and sticky.... Jizz

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Ding dong Who's there Electricity

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A Jew walks into a bar...He uses his coupon to get a free drink, then leaves.

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alert('The Game')

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

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A duck walks into a bar. Animal control is promptly called and the duck is released in a nearby park in a safe and risk free process.

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Your mamas so fat that she went to the doctor and he said she has a very high case of diabetes so now she's trying to excerise more and watching what she eats.

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Q: Have you ever seen Ray Charles wife? A: Nethier has he.

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Bill: Wanna know the difference between knowledge and wisdom? Joe: Sure Bill: Knowledge is knowing that an apple is a fruit. Wisdom is knowing not to put it in a fruit salad.

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Bro: Aww Dawg! What if they tell me I got da aids? Dawg!: Hey don worry bro, you gotta BE POSITIVE

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How do you make a clown cry? You hit them with an axe

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God told John to come forth and recieve internal golry forever. John came fifth and recieved a toaster.

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When is the best time to wear a striped sweater? All the time.

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Why are there so many blacks in prison? *The rest of this joke has been removed to avoid causing offence*

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What do you call 1 black guy and 9 other white guys? Patrick Mills

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What did the coworker say about the new girls butt Nothing be cause he was quite the gentleman and wanted to be respectful ts the woman as she already had enough problems such as being hit by a bus and dying.

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I will create more jobs for americans

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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