What did the man say to the cat? I thought you were fake.

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If your yacht is if moving at 50 knots per hour in a wind tunnel how many leprechauns can you fit in a chamber? Even, because purple is attracted to bestiality.

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Why is Michael Jackson bad at chess ? Because he is dead.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It's hard to tell, but i could really use a cigarette.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "why the long face?" The horse replies "my whole family was killed in 911... And I used the money I got from life insurance to get plastic surgery to always have a smile on my face. My doctor botched the surgery, so now my face is elongated. Even for a horse, of course."

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Why did the audience walk out of the movie? Because it had just finished.

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What do you call it wen black people are sky diving? ...Night

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Jack and Jill went up the hill....Just kidding, it was only Jill. Jack had no legs

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Whats the difference between a monkey and another monkey? I dont know google it!

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A kid comes across an injured duck near a lake. Nevermind he doesn't see it he's really high.

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In Soviet Russia... ...there are many buildings and landmarks for the viewing.

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Why was the blonde so dumb? She had a severe case of dyslexia, which made it difficult to study.

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I've always hated people saying "last one there is a rotten egg" because don't you want to be a rotten egg so you don't get eaten?

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Why did the slut suck a dick? Because she's a slut.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because grass don't eat meat.

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Why did the girl call suicide hotline? Cuz he wanted to kill herself.

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Why isn't eating an Olympic sport? Because that wouldn't make any sense.

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Why didn't the octopus have any friends? Because they are antisocial creatures by nature. -Louis

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What did the child say after the priest touched him? Thank you for the ashes Father, have a blessed Lenten season.

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why did the kitten drink its milk? because it doesnt have a motor so has no need for petrol.

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What's worse than killing 6,000,000 Jews? Killing 6,000,001.

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The doctor told a man he had aids. He told his friends he had AIDS so his friends wouldn't sleep with his wife after he died.

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What's the best way to piss off a feminist? R@pe her.

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A black man sits down to have a legal conversation with his state appointed attorney for the first time being arrested. They lawyer advises him to tell him the truth of exactly what happened. He proceeds to do so and is provided with excellent legal advice.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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