What did the penis say to the condom? Cover me i'm going in.

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What's black and white and red all over and can't turn around in an elevator? A nun with a spear through her back

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Knock knock Who's there? No one ever mentioned someone named "there" it's me, Jim

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What do you call a man with bananas in his ears? A doctor. He is clearly mentally unstable, and probably in pain.

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Why was the blind man bored? - He was in a coma

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What do you get when you stab a six year old with a pair of scissors and a machete? A very angry, potentially murderous mother out for revenge.

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What do Kobe Bryant and a toaster have in common? They both rape white women. Except for the toaster.

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how do you confuse a blonde do nothing

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What is wet, white and sticky? Glue, of course.

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What is pink and fuzzy? Pink fuzz

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Where does a one-legged waitress work? Wherever she can get good health insurance.

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If Irishmen didn't walk out of bars, they would collect and eventually fill the bars of the world and would die given the bars could not support them.

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yo mama just like a toilet, white and full of crap!

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How do you know when you're on the wrong side of the tracks? You don't. (Wyndellberg)

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Q. Why did the man walk away from his wife? A. Because he wanted to walk away from his wife.

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Q Why did the chicken cross the road? A Because it couldn't fly

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Why was a black man in a prison cell? He was a highly respected plumber fixing a prisoner's faulty toilet.

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Why is this the worst joke ever? Because it isn't even funny.

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Whats faster than a black guy with a tv? His brother who is a dentist and drives a fast sports car.

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Why is Stevie Wonder called Stevie Wonder? Wonder where I am.

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What's the difference between Timmy and a car? Timmy can be brutally murdered.

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A squirrel asks an apple where is the nearest gas station. The apple doesn't reply.

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Why was the nympho sweating in the park? Because they were having sex on the bench.

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Why was the Irish Cop happy to see the Mexican family killed in a accident? Because the Lopez family were a family known for generosity and selflessness. It came as no surprise to anyone who knew Steven Lopez and his beloved family that they were all organ donors and not only that but Shelly Lopez, Steven's oldest daughter had blood type O negative (the universal donor). Officer McO'Brianiganly's wife is dying in the hospital in need of a kidney transplant, doctors have given her just weeks to live. Now, thanks to unfortunate events for la familia Lopez., Officer McO'Brianiganly and his wife can live a long happy life together, just as they always imagined.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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