A man walked into a bar. Too bad he didn't see it.The man was sent to the hospital 2 hours later when a friendly elderly lady found him badly wounded on the ground.

how do you make a baby cry? you throw a brick at it's face!

how do you make a baby cry? You throw a brick at it's face

There once was a man from Nantucket, who had his car stolen and wasn't very happy so called the police.

What happened to the pleasure robot he pleasured someone in the pussy

Why did the man visit 4chan? He heard about it from a coworker and was curious about what it was.

Women's Rights

what do u call a blonde in the libary? alexandra wallace

"Sticks and stones" the man said and shat on three different complex turtles

roses are red tulips are too, violets are violet, not freaking blue.

Why wasn't the TV remote working? It was out of batteries.

A termite walks intio a bar, looks the lovely timber bar up and down, and wonders out loud..."where's the bar tender?"

Knock Knock Who's there? The electrician, I'm here to fix your door bell.

A guy walks into a bar and orders a beer. There is a frog in his beer.

when nothing goes right go left because if you go straight you will fall off the cliff

Have you seen stevie wonders house? neither has he.

Two scientists are working in a lab. The first one asks, "Do you want some sodium?" The second one pours acid into the first one's eyes.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse replies, "I just found out my wife has cervical cancer."

lets go to the beach beach lets go get away story of josh browns life

An American man and a Chinese man have a conversation. The American man asks the Chinese man after a couple of minutes of speaking, "How long have you lived in the United States?" The Chinese man replies, "I moved to the United States when I was ten years old."

What is the difference between Jesus and jackAwhole lota fat

Listen bitch, get over here, let me poke out your fucking eyeball, and then you tell me if it is reasonable or not to fucking be pissed afterwards! As for your goddamn technique, of course I understand it, I use it too, its the ironman method as far as I am concerned. Do not share it with people here, you can go share it with your little "shadow people" but that shit took years to develop. But yeah, you tell me whatever the hell you consider "reasonable" you get me the money, and then we can see about being "reasonable". I know many of your methods, NLP, hypnosis, covert, warm and cold reading, I know you are no fucking psychic nor do you read minds, stop telling me what the hell your "Order" is, because whatever the hell it is, your "Nero`s" have proven on this site alone, that its a laughingstock that in no way could have brought six hundred people towards liking you, even less six millions.

What did the caterpillar say to the robot? Nothing. Caterpillars do not have vocal chords and there are not, as yet, any truly portable robots capable of comprehending speech so to speak to one would be pointless.

Whats worse than one bee sting? Two bee stings. Whats worse than two bees stings? The holocaust. Whats worse than the holocaust? Three bee stings. Now, if you have been well-educated you should be able to tell the problem with this joke. Unless you know someone whos jewish and lived during the holocaust, you couldn't be sure if three bee stings was actually worse than the holocaust. If ou do however, thats good for you, keep it to yourself.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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