A horse, a duck, a pig, and a muslim walk into bar. The horse ducks, the duck's hoarse, the pig's in a blanket, and the muslim has a can, being surprised at how far a can can preach hate in chicago. The bartender reminds the muslim that he is keeping company with a swine, and the muslim feels offended for the poor horse.

Why doesn't Austin have sex? Because when his wife gets hot he puts dirt on her and hits her with a shovel

What do you call man with no limbs or a head? Your neighbor.

What's green, has four legs and falls from trees? A praying mantis that lost a battle and had it's frongt two legs removed causing it to lose balance and gripand plumet groundward from the tree.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Alzheimer's Where am I

Abe Lincholn had a son, But he died

What's good about sex with twenty-three year olds? There's twenty of them.

Why was the man attracted to other men? Because he was gay, and that is typically what happens when people are attracted to members of the same sex, and it is as natural as a man being attracted to women.

mary poppins' handbag is full of fuckin dick

What did the tramp get for Christmas? Nothing because he's Jewish.

What did the kid with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? a horse

What did the Firefighter say to his crew when they put out the fire.... - Let's go home.

Why did the Taxi crash? The cab driver was trying to remove the frog stapled to his face.

Whats the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? A mosquito is a common insect in the family Culicidae. A blonde on the other hand is a Homo sapien, a primate species of mammal with a highly developed brain, belonging to the family of great apes, along with chimpanzees, bonobos, gorillas, and orangutans

So a crippled guy rolls into a bar..

the person who wrote 1 under me is gay

Q: What's funnier than rape? A: Many things such as murder or nuclear warfare.

Q:What did the midget say to the toll booth operator? A: Is your family dead too?

Knock Knock Who's there? Bob Bob who? Your neighbor

What Did Gretel say to Hansel? Stop having sex with Ariana Grande!

Why was the mohel touching the little boy's penis? Because that's his job!

What did the legless veteran get for christmas, The same grenade that blew up his legs.

My father stole my mothers heart, he's in jail for murder

yo momma so fat dora couldn't even explore her!!!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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