what did the cashier do when a Mexican robbed the store? call the police

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What do you say when you accidently punch a wasps nest? Nothing.The correct choice is ton run as fast as you can to avoid getting stung by the entire nest of wasps.

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A loving father took his two children to the park for a picnic. while the children went into the lake for a swim he drowned them both

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Why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side... (other side as in the afterlife, for it committed suicide by crossing the road)

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Your mama is so fat, we are all seriously concerned about her health.

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A white man is found dead in an alley way, who was the murderer? The black guy trying to climb up the walls to escape.

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yo momma is so stupid, she probably in in the bottom 1% of her age group

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A guy walks into a bar. The second guy ducks.

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What did the duck say? Nothing. Everyone knows that ducks can't talk.

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whats fat round and mentally special? PeterPanMyHero!

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Nick Demarco got butt due to the high number of females in his apartment

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steve walked into a bar, what happened next? A: He fell down.

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Three penguins sitting in a tub. The first penguin says to the third penguin, "Hey would you pass the soap?" The penguin in the middle says, "What do you think I am a typewriter?"

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So a horse walks into a bar, oh wait Sarah Jessica Parker

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Q: What race was Jesus Christ? A: None, he's not real

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Which is heavier, a tonne of feathers or a tonne of lead? It doesn't matter when your loved ones are being torn apart by bears.

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why is the sky blue? because your mother blocked your computer to meatspin.com

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Q: What does a bunny and a plum have in common? A: They're both purple except the bunny.

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What's worse then 1 bee sting? -2 Bee stings. What's worse then 2 bee stings? -The Holocaust. What's worse then the Holocaust? -3 Bee stings.

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Why did the boy fall off the swing? -Because he didn't have any arms!

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Why did Hayden Bryant walk down the street? Because he can, dont doubt Hayden Bryant.

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Q: How do you make a five year cry twice? A: There are many ways, as children are generally not that adept at controlling their emotions. Loud noises, threats of violence, images of scary monsters... those tend to work. Be sure to let them stop crying before making them cry again, otherwise you will have only made them cry once.

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why did the money fall out of the tree... because he was dead

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How much wood would a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? The woodchuck's ability to chuck has been left indeterminable. Therefore until the wood chuck's prowess in wood chucking is brought to light we must leave it a variable. Using the coefficient (L) to represent wood that can possibly be chucked. Then using (C) to represent the life cycle of said wood chuck chucking. We are also assuming this woodchuck will remain vigilante and not require food or sleep for the entire duration of chucking ultimately lowering is maximum chucking output. From this we can determine the W.C.P.S. (wood chucks per second). Finally subtract the remaining wood (RW) from the chucked total and we have rendered that : L(W.C.P.S) - (C -RM/t) = X

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops