Knock knock. Who's there? Big Brother. Big Brother who? That's right. ALL are who, Akbar!

thumb_up thumb_down +1

There are fewer coppers on sundays. As well as criminality.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Donald Trump

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why couldn't John go to the store for his mother? He had no legs...

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Technically rainbows are white.....and have gold at the end.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Two friends are sitting on a couch watching TV. One friend accidently turned on a pornography channel. The other friend felt awkward and went home.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side Why did the duck cross the road? I don't know. I only know why the chicken crossed the road.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Billy: Why do pirates say rrrrr? Mark: I don't know, I'm not a pirate.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

whats the same about a donkey and a horse? They are from the same animal classification group.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

There are 3 people in a car, shit, manners, and asshole. They are driving and shit falls out. They pull over and manners gets out to help shit. Then a cop comes and pulls them over. The cop ask asshole what his name is. He said asshole. The cop said what. Then asshole said asshole. Then the cop says where are your manners. Asshole said over their picking up shit.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

How do you get rid of Herpes? You can't.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why didn't the skeleton go to the dance ? "because he had nobody to go with" No because it was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A blonde walks into a bar. The bartender says, "What're you drinking?" The blonde says, "Nothing yet. That's why I'm in a bar. But your lack of basic observation skills is disturbing."

thumb_up thumb_down +1

whats the difference between a pizza and a jew? Pizza is not human, Jewish people are.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson go camping, and pitch their tent under the stars. During the night, Holmes wakes his companion and says: 'Watson, look up at the stars, and tell me what you deduce.' Watson says: 'Someboby stole our tent.' Holmes and Watson look at each other, shrug and go back to sleep. At least the thief kept their blankets.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What is sad and disappointing? Nevada's and California's snow pack.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

I like my women like I like my coffee. Hot, black, liquid, and in a cup.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the father leave work early on his son's birthday? He was rushed to the hospital after facing a severe heart attack due to a history of cardiovascular disease in his family.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

my friend got in a car wreck,he lost his left arm and left leg. how is he now? Hes all right.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

"I love you terribly!" said the girl to her new boyfriend. "You already had me chained to the bed. You didn't have to break both of my legs, Kathy Bates."

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why does the black man take drugs. Because he is very sick.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Knock Knock Who's there? Gilbert Gilbert who? Goddamn it David just open the door

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why couldn't the melons get married? As gay cantaloupes, their jurisdiction didn't allow for same-sex marriage.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops