what did the boy who liked trucks get for his birthday? POOP

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Who has two thumbs and lost them? Me but I can't really point at myself due to the lack of thumbs.

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What did the piano say to the ice cube? Dude, get back in the freezer or you are going to melt!

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Q:What happened after the snake tricked Adam and Eve into eating fruit from the tree of wisdom? A: Nothing, but the three of knowledge was a whole other story though. Moral Man.

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What's Tyrion Lannister short for? It's not short for anything, it's his full name.

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A man walked into a bar. He needed 5 stitches.

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How many Jews can you fit into a Volkswagen Beatle? Two in the front, two in the back, and one hundred in the ash tray.

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why did suzie fall of the swings? because she had no arms.

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I like my wine like I like my children... Eight years old and locked in a cellar

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What do you call a guy who likes men? Gay

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Why did the black man have a gun in his hand? He was crossing through a dangerous neighborhood and was offering protection to himself and his family.

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Q: What is the difference between a potato chip and a frog? A: Neither one of them is a flower.

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A bus with 12 black guys is driven off a cliff. What is the sad part of this story? ... Our beloved president was not involved.

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A hooker walks into a bar. She orders a few drinks and leaves. She's a man.

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A blond, a brunet, and a red head jumped off a bridge. Which one hit the ground first? In order to solve this problem you would first need to figure out witch of the three had more of a body mass. Then you would need to calculate the accretion in case one brought along a cow. However, in the end the outcome is always the same: 3 dead bodies on impact and 3 mourning families.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? having your limbs scliced off with a chainsaw and being put in a cage to get mauled by a Mutant Man-eating horse.

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The teacher asked her class "What is 42 + 17?" Several hands were flung into the air. "71!" said Billy excitedly. "No, I'm sorry that is incorrect." said the teacher. "67!" shouted Carl at the top of his lungs. "Incorrect!" said the teacher. Then little Johnny raised his hand. "The answer is 69" he said full of intellectual delight. "Very good." said the teacher.

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What did the farmer say to the other farmer? "Uh... So, you're a farmer?"

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Q: How do you stop a black man from drowning? A: Quit peeing in his mouth.

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What's worse than a fly in your soup? Cancer.

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what happens when a mexican makes love to an octopus? It makes a freaking weird looking animal

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What's sad about a truck passing behind a duck? A: Behind the Duck were the Ducklings.

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The feds ruined the first underground, so in order for this to not happen you joined them?

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Why did the boy get hit by a bus? Because he was standing in front of the bus.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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