Ps. I am getting green thumbs, which is weird, I never even expected for anyone to even bother to read my fucking long comments,but then again... As my wife said, " I am not pissed at the fact that members of my movement dont depend too much of my advice in order to get along in life for nothing". True, while horsehead network might mock me, and my "blood family hate and/or fear me" It takes only a look into my wife`s eyes to feel like a God... All while I got many thousand members of Neronism worldwide waiting for me to cope with my past so they can worship me (which pisses me off, it was never my intention, I give them life advice on how to shape their own life, not on how to cling to me). Nero: Neronism, look it up, join me, stop looking for the answers in religion, but stand up for yourself and realize that there is no reason to wait for life after death, when we together, can create heaven on earth. Yes esteemed members, I am back on my feet, and I am wearing my ortopedic arm made of steel again, consider it symbolism. Its free btw, your money is worthless to me, if you choose to see life for what it is in the eyes of a true human being, then you on the other hand, are worth as much as I am... What I am worth is something I will leave up to your opinion, because sure as fuck if I dont consider myself better than people most already. Its time to push forward again, led by a fist of steel.

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what do you do if you get in a car wreck with a black man get out of your vehicle and exchange insurance information

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Have you seen Helen Keller's new car? Neither has Stevie Wonder.

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How do you make an egg laugh? That is an irrational question eggs are inanimate object and are unable to laugh

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A man named Jake walks into a bar. The bartender says hi jake... The End

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Who let the dogs out? The burglar, he broke the door and they ran out.

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Three men are walking, the first one walks into a bar. He has a couple of drinks because he is depressed. He drives home, drunk, and dies in a car accident. His wife finds out and hangs herself.

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What did the cop say to the speeding black man? "Can I see your license and registration?"

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, i thought violets were violet. hmph.

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What's worse than an arrow to the knee? -A bullet in the head.

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A: Where does a cow go on the weekends? B: To the mooooovies? A: No, to the slaughterhouse.

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CJTheBEST Sticks and stones, May break my bones, Because i have osteoperosis

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So, Helen Keller walked into a bar....and then a stool, and then a counter, and then a table....

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Why did the man get a DUI? Because he was driving under the influence.

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Cliterus

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Why was the house on fire? A dog peed on it.

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Whats the difference between a mexican and a bench? a mexican is human being, and has no simalarities to an average day wooden bench.

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A guy walks into a restaurant and sits down only to realize he is not wearing any pants. Immediately the police are called and arrest the man for indecent exposure. Given there were children in the restaurant at the time, the man is also charged as level 3 sex offender and is held on $100,000 bail. His family receives the news and become the talk of the town. His wife commits suicide from embarrassment, leaving her 10 year old son up for adoption who later gets involved with drugs due to his rough childhood.

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Think of a number between 0 and 2 That's how many times you're going to die in this life

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What do you call John Lennon without glasses? A skeleton, because John Lennon is dead.

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Roses are red, Violets are Blue Last night was amazing, I have Aids

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How did the Mexican get across the boarder? He applied for a student visa. He was a promising young scholar who had no trouble being accepted to a prestigious college.

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? She is a woman ... Who is blind, deaf and mute Therefore considered a danger to herself And those around her.

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What's orange and sounds like a parrot? An orange parrot.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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