Why did the chicken cross the road? 'Cause you touch yourself at night;

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Why did the sloth cross the road? To slaughter your entire family.

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If you have 5 bucks and Chuck Norris has 5 buck you both have 5 bucks

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a naked man walks into a bar. he is promptly escorted out because you must have shoes and a shirt to be served

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What is Hellen Keller's favorite movie? Around the block in 80 days.

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What is the opposite of pro? Con right? So what's the opposite of progress? Congress

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Why did the bird plummet to the earth? It was shot.

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Sally bought a shakeweight. She is an alcoholic and is ruining her family.

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We started this thing together, I do not get it, he is like you said, just a little nerd...

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Whats two plus two Four!

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Q: If Ann has 5 apples and she gives Michael 2 apples, and then Jason comes and rapes Ann. How many apples does Ann have left? R: Who the hell cares, she needs to go to the police.

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Why can't women play poker? Because they're freaking stupid!

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Chuck Norris was so good at karate that he held the middle weight world title for 6 years and was named fighter of the year by Black Belt Magazine. He also used his talents to start a successful acting and advertising career.

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How did the man know he was gay? Australia is full of kangaroos

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Mitt Romney is in the mormon mafia has magic underpants and invented Obama Care but he still lost to a Black guy Who is a fine president.

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Q: Why was the american flag red, white, and blue? A:Because that's how it is!

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the moment right after you finish the last harry potter and remember the world wasn't saved and you still have cancer

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Why didn't Michael J. Fox feel the Virginia earthquake? He was on vacation in Maui.

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A man is wrongfully convicted of murder and sent to prison. After a lengthy appeals process the guilty verdict is overturned and he walks away a free man.

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Knock knock! Who's there? Joe Barkley. Joe Barkley who? ...

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How do you get a blonde to eat crayons? Threaten to kill her parents with a hacksaw.

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What's the difference between a pile of rotting shit about to be re-heated in the microwave and Kevin James's new movie "The Zookeeper" ... Nothing.

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whats fun,atracks children and says wrape van on it my van i lied about it being fun

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What's worse than a bad joke? A joke that end's mid sente--

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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