Why did billy fall off his bike? Because billy was a loaf of bread.

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When is a door not a door? When your house burns down.

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Why was the boy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Wanna buy some meth.

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Dear paranoid people who check behind their shower curtains for murderers, If you do find one, what`s your plan?

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What do you call a black man carrying a T.V? Someone that is helping me move.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have five fingers, The middle one's for you.

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When life gives you cancer, make cancer-aids.

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A: Did you know Helen Keller had a treehouse? B: No. A: Neither did she.

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What is similar about Michael Jackson and Walmart? Nothing they have nothing to do with each other

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What did John say to Paul before they entered the car? "Paul, get in the car."

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You know what sucks? A vacuum.

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Why were the parents sad? Because their son had a frog stapled to his face and was trying to eat his ice cream on a swing, but he had no arms so he dropped his ice cream into the street and he chased after his ice cream and got hit by a bus

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Why was Cinderella so bad at ball? Isn't that sexist, making assumptions about Cinderella's sports capability when you have never seen her play sports before (because she is a fictional character) and then asking why this is true when you have no proof that it is in fact true? But I would guess the correct answer is (if she is bad at ball in the first place) that she never played ball before. Think about it. Why did you have to ask this question at all? Isn't it obvious?

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That was totally mean! I mean I was in no way going to say any of that to you! Especially not the last part, sorry that must have been part of the suggestion or something, I barely ever tell myself stuff like that, I mean stop it okay? I mean I totally read it and all but I was all like "I am notnot typing that" please stop it, its humiliating.

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why did the chicken cross the road? its a chicken giving it the tendencies to wander if not properly fenced in.

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An Irishman walks into a club. "Ow, that was almost as painful as that time I walked into a bar."

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A blonde was taking a Math exam, so she brought her Asian boyfriend with her. It turns out they were going to his father's retirement party afterwards.

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Why did the little boy let go of his balloon? Because I was raping his face.

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Whats black and blue and red all over? An infant after its been beaten with a bat.

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The only positive thing in my life, is the HIV test! Lymmel

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What did the frog say when it was attacked? Ribbit.

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What did John name his dog? Doggy

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I still remember the last thing my grandfather said before he kicked the bucket. He said: "Hey, I wonder how far I can kick this bucket."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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