I just flew in from New Zealand, and boy am I tired. It was a really long flight and I found it incredibly difficult to sleep in those seats, so I didn't bother and kept myself awake watching in-flight films the whole way.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What do you get when you cross the motorway with a lottery ticket? You get knocked down and killed.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Lady: I think you guys would be very happy here. Chandler: No no no no no no! No, we're not together. We're not a couple, definitely not a couple! Joey: You seem pretty insulted by that. What? I'm not good enough for you? Chandler: We're not going to have this conversation AGAIN!

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What happened when the blind man reached for his soda? He picked it up, took a sip, and placed it back down where it was and continued with what he was doing.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

thumb_up thumb_down -17

what's the only thing worse than losing a pen before a test? getting raped by a pedifile. -teagan doherty-

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What is one similarity between John Samos, and the dreadful clown? they have a red nose and are payed to be funny, aside from John Samos!

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why did the woman go out of the kitchen? She did not because she had a curse put on by a man off the streets of Greek row a Yale that said u may never leave the closest kitchen near this very spot, and it turns out that the closest kitchen was in a frat house across the street so now she is stuck in the kitchen making sandwiches for all the frat bros at this Yale frat house, So basically she was in her place

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What's black and white all over and has a mouth? A Zebra

thumb_up thumb_down -17

A man walks into a bar. It hurt.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What do you get when you cross a moose with a crépe? A moose with a crépe up his nose. -ilikecrepes97

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why did the man ask the IPhone to marry him He was smoking weed

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Knock Knock Who's there? Eat a d!ck you sh!t fukk! I'm going have to ask you leave now

thumb_up thumb_down -17

The awkward moment when you are reading these jokes and either it's not funny or you don't get it...

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What is black and white and red all over? Interracial sex partners with smallpox.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why was the little girl crying? Because she was hanging upside down from an oak tree.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What do you call Metta World Peace after he has hit somebody? Metta World War.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why do people make jokes about cancer? Oviously to get thier ass kicked!!! -BY:KOLBY HOOKS

thumb_up thumb_down -17

September 11 was the 9/11 of all terrorist attacks.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

A man finds out he was molested by his father as a child.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What do you call a woman with two black eyes? Irish sunglasses

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Two antennas falls in love. They get married. The wedding was horrible, but the reception was great.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops