Knock knock. Who's there? Fire extinguisher. Fire extinguisher who? POMEGRANITES.

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What is fat and white? A polar bear with a glandular problem.

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Why the moron throw the clock out the window? Because he was a moron.

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What's the difference between a hundred dead babies and a porsche? A porsche is a car.

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why did John fall off his bike I don't know I was not there it was a rumor at school

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Q:whats the wost thing that can happen to you when you find something? A:not finding something

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Your momma's so fat she ate oranges and coffe

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one time, there was this anti-joke.com joke set-up. It was just like a normal joke set-up. was the anti-joke punchline effective, artful of funny at all? no. it was a plain statement of some facts without consideration for humor. it gets old after you read like 50 of them. it gets REALLY. F*CKIN. OLD.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue; In Soviet Russia, POEM WRITES YOU!

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What did the sign say? It said slow down

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What did the cat say to the dog before chasing each other You have a nice looking ass

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Why did the black man drop his weed Because he got shot

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what is worse than gay sex wiping your ass with sandpaper

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Q: How do you know a chinese guy robbed your house? A: your homework is done, your computer is updated, and 2 hours later he is still trying to back out of your driveway

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If anything is possible try to staple water to a tree.

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alert("Hello");

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See now, that is because you consider yourself my submissive on a both concious and subconcious level, your body and mind wants me to take care of you. I could say it is because I read minds, but why read minds, when I can create them, why read the future, when you can create it. Finally, lets take a look into the word, nerve endings yes? Not nerve endings baby, its called Suggestion. But seriously though, lets put the word nerve endings on top of the word suggestions again there. Nerve endings, did I mention it works on your butt too? You see, usually you would say no, but you do know that now that I am your master, you do and enjoy as I say? See you baby. Moral: "Feel the grove, I control the way you move"

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How many alcoholics does it take to change a light bulb? Look. I just enjoy a few drinks every now and then. I mean, I can quit whenever I want to. That's no reason to start people calling names.. Wait, no. That's not.. Look. How much do you drink every day, huh? Why not ask that? And why do I have to be the one changing your stupid light bulb? If it's sooooo important that the light bulb be changed, do it yourself, you lazy bastard. Don't rely on other people to do your work for you.

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A man walked into a bar. Ouch! He tripped over the little step at the entrance. But don't worry, he's not hurt, it just startled him for a second there. They should put a caution sign out front, somebody might get a serious injury. You can never be too safe, after all.

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Whats old and has been alone for years. Your dead nan

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anti-joke.ru - russian style

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Blonde: Where's the ice? Asian: In the freezer.

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My mom so fat, when she jumps gravity pushed her away from the ground

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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