How long did it take the man to swim the Atlantic? I don't know. Everybody stopped counting after a while and went on with their lives. His body was never found.

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A black man and a white man enter a public toilet. They both begin to pee at the urinals. The whiteman peers over to the blackman mid-pee. He is dissappointed to find that the black man's penis is not large according to stereotype and then blushes embarassed by his own latent homosexuality. They both leave the toilet and never see eachother again. The white man cries himself to sleep later that night. 'I've been hiding too long' he thinks.

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Why did little jimmy fall of the playground? He was blind and wasn't aware of his surroundings

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Q: What did one water bottle say to another water bottle? A: Nothing. Water bottles are inanimate objects and are thus unable to communicate.

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How do you kill a baby? You don't muder is a sin and against the law

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Suzie.

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Yo mama so fat when she dresses in red she looks like clifford the big red dog!

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whats worst than finding a worm in your apple???? an apple in your worm.

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What did the man say to the cat? I thought you were fake.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It's hard to tell, but i could really use a cigarette.

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Q. What do you call an average middle-aged white man who walks into a bar and asks for a drink? A. Not a very funny joke

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Did you hear the one about the spoon and the dis running away while the cow jumped over the moon, IMPOSSIBLE! eating material such as the spoon and dish are inanimate objects, and cows cant jump for they weigh from 600 to 1000 lbs.

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Have you seen the newest starwars? What movie? I mean that episode where stars fight... Will Smith vs Keanu Reeves? I am talking about the stars in the sky firing at each other! You know, those star pilots on planes... Flown by Will Smith and Keanu Reeves? BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM! (You heard that one in your head)

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What was a hard time for people? the great depression

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A man walks into a bar. He tricks a lady into smelling a rag doused with chlorophoam, and rapes her.

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How do you make a Cowboy cry? You kill his family.

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What do you call a black man running faster than a white man? Usain Bolt

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Why didn't the octopus have any friends? Because they are antisocial creatures by nature. -Louis

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Dear Six, Please stop spreading rumors about me and nine. I hear you two also do some pretty nasty things. Love, Seven.

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How do you know if you have athlete's foot? You ask your doctor, and he will tell you.

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What do an asian, a black man, and a Mexican all have in common? They all belong minorites that at one time have been outcast by society

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what word starts with the letter N and ends with the letter R that you never wanna call a black person? Neighbor

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Why did the Cross chicken the road? Because it wasn't the way to the Lord

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What did the child say after the priest touched him? Thank you for the ashes Father, have a blessed Lenten season.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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