what has hair? Organisms, or at least most do.

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Hey you must be a parking ticket, because your yellow.

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What did the blind man say to his wife? -would you mind helping me upstairs, for I cannot see.

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? (Because she was blind and deaf?) No, because she was a woman.

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Two kids are playing basketball. One says to the other, "FAILMUFFIN!" The basketball flies out of bounds.

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Yo mama so short, she developed a debilitating neck problem from having to look up at people when talking to them.

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The Below statement is an antijoke. The Above statement is a joke.

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The Pope, a Rabi and an Islamic religious leader go into a room and come out with what? A new understanding of each others cultures.

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What's green and has wheels? Grass i was lying about the wheels.

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Whats the difference between a truck full of bowling balls and a truck full of dead babies? You can't unload one with a pitchfork

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What do you call a black pilot? A pilot, you racist.

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who can be more evil than the person who hit my nuts. Adolf Hitler.

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Is it closer to Minneapolis, or by bus?

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what's the difference between a jew and a bar of soap? You don't rub your nuts with a jew.

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Why was the man attracted to other men? Because he was gay, and that is typically what happens when people are attracted to members of the same sex, and it is as natural as a man being attracted to women.

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What do a bicycle and a platypus have in common? They both have wheels, except the platypus doesn't.

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What is striped black and white? A prisoner in jail arrested for the murder and rape of a 7 year old child.

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Knock knock. Who is there? My wife. My wife who? My wife is a prostitute, selling her own body for money so we can afford drugs for my son who has cancer.

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Once upon a time, there were two brothers jumping on a bed. The one stopped because the other fell off the bead and died.

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Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

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People really hate it when sentenses don't end the way elephants wear hats

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what did one paper football say to the other? did you get flicked off too.

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why did they plain crash? cause of gravity stupid

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Pickles.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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