Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue If it wasnt for christmas We would all be jewish.

If you had 4 oranges in one hand and 7 oranges in the other, what would you have? Really big hands.

Q. What is a deaf man's favorite song? A. Nothing, because he can not hear.

Whats slower than molasses? Slightly thicker molasses.

Why did the fat man cross the road? Because he felt that being overweight, he had to do something about it and go to the gym.

Why was the prostitute unsuccessful? because she had no vagina

Do cows get breast cancer or utter cancer?

a white van was driving really slow and he stopped in front 3 children. "do you want some candy" the old man said. the kids took the candy and the old man drove away happily, knowing he made someones day.

Guess what sucks! A Vaccume. Guess what blows! A Sucky Vaccume.

It's 4/20. You know what that means? Today is a Wednesday

So seriously you have never ever played videogames before?

what does the doctor do when he tells you you have aids? he laughs and says "hahahahahhaha sucks for you, i dont!"

why did the horse drop its ice cream Because it doesnt have thumbs so it cant hold the ice cream

There was three women stuck on an island, a blonde, a brunette and a ranga. They are saved days later.

Whats worse than the holocaust? Sex with helen keller.

Q: What's worse than ten babies stapled to one tree? A: One baby stapled to ten trees.

look at the top of your screen. now look down. I MADE YOU DO THAT

What do you call a rapist who uses condoms and excessive lubricant? A Rapist.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Why don't you ask the chicken. I am sorry but I as a human being am totally incapable of understanding and communicating with chickens.

Ask me about my wiener. How's your wiener? I don't have a wiener, I'm a woman.

Why are they the "living" daylights?

when life gives you lemons... squeeze the juice into your eyes.

A light bulb is very similar in shape to a pear. So, when you change a light bulb, don't replace it by a pear.

Knock Knock Whos there? Rivkee Rivkee who? RIVKEEEEE FIRETRUCK!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...