Why did the clown go to jail? He murdered a thirteen-year-old girl.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

How do I become successful like you dad? Just do good.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

i have a black man in my family tree. i am 25% african american among several other ethnicities.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why did the Jewish man stop to pick up a quarter off the filthy street? He saw a homeless man begging on the street corner and thought that he could give him the spare change he found.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Roses are red, and many other colors too.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Bob: Do you know the difference between beer and women? John: No Bob: Oh

thumb_up thumb_down +14

How does a black man get to his parent's house on Christmas? He drives

thumb_up thumb_down +14

I have read and agree to the Terms of Service.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Your big dick.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

A train conducter conducts goes at 60mph, when he goes under a bridge he goes at 52mph. When he goes over a hill he goes at 47mph. If he goes under 3 bridges and over 6 hills what did the conductors mother eat for dinner that night. Nothing, after many months of suffering she died from Huntington's disease.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why couldn't the immigrant who was brand new to America hold a conversation with anyone? He was mute.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Once upon of time, there was an ugly duckling. It was so ugly that everyone died. The end.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why did the chicken cross the road? Across the street was a strip mall containing a dry cleaners where he had to pick up his suit for his cousins wedding. The wedding caused controversy in the family considering she was jewish. He had a lot to drink and took a cab home, knowing the dangers of drunk driving in todays society. He had a great time.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Im about to rewrite History....... History

thumb_up thumb_down +14

A man wakes up after only one hour of sleep due to his insomnia. He starts to cry because his wife just passed away and his parents were recently killed in a car accident. The man gathers his composure, takes a shower, and drives to his minimum wage job. He was expelled from high school for an assault he didnt even commit and has no money to get an education. At work, he accidentally drops a box of valuable, fragile electronic parts and gets fired by his boss. He goes home to his dirty 1 bedroom apartment and contemplates suicide. He decides to wait as his favorite tv show is on. He turns on the tv to the news his show has been cancelled. The man, depressed, suicidal and alone, picks up his .22 and kills himself. There is no God.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

whats long hard and full of seamen? a submarine.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

2 men walk into a bar, the 3rd man ducks and ask them if they're ok

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Evil Witch: Hey Snow White, want an apple. Snow White: No thank you, I just ate, I'm good. Evil Witch: But its good! Snow White: No thanks, I'm good! Evil Witch: Ill put caramel on it!! Snow White: NO THANKS! Evil Witch: FINE!! The Evil Witch then pulled out an AK - 47 and violently murdered Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why did the black guy get a boner? The nitric oxide levels in his trabecular arteries and smooth muscle of his penis rose, causing his arteries to dilate and therefore enlarging his penis.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Question: What is worse then a worm in your apple? Answer: A number of different things I would imagine...

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why was the man dress in a suit ? He had a job

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue. Vodka is cheaper than dinner for two.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Whats the difference between a Jew and a Pig? One makes bacon when smoked.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

why did the chicken cross the road? because he wanted to!

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops