If there's something strange in your neighborhood, who you gonna call? The Police.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she has no arms. *Knock knock* "Who's there?" "Not Sally."

A apple a day keeps gramar away.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was died...

What is pink and smells like tuna? Salmon

Knock Knock. Who's there? Chris. Chris who? Wow, I thought we were better friends than that.

why did little johnny start choking? because somebody shoved a bag down his throat

What's green and invisible? This cabbage in my hand.

what did the boy with no arms and no legs get for christmas? A- a tv

a blonde does something stupid. she dies. its funny.

A horse, a duck, a pig, and an arab walk into a bar. The horse ducks, the duck's hoarse, the pig's in a blanket, and the arab has a can, being surprised at how far a can can preach hate in Chicago. The bartender reminds the arab that he's with a swine, and the arab is offended for the poor horse.

You're mom is so slutty, she has sex with many men.

what do you call a dumb blonde with no arms? Her name because she will not respond to anything else

A Polish immigrant goes to the Department of Motor Vehicles to apply for a driver’s license. He has to take an eye test. They show him a card with the letters C Z W I X N O S T A C Z. “Can you read this?” the optician asks. “Read it?” the Polish guy replies, “No, sir. Allow me to put on my glasses."

Roses are red Violets are blue I love you a lot But you're dead and I have unhealthy necrophiliac tendencies

Why can't Molly ride her bike? Because she has no arms or legs. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Molly.

knock knock? come in

Why did the bald man go to hospital? Because we was getting chemotherapy

What did the Jewish man get for his birthday? Pork.

did u ever hear a bird joke "no" hawkword

Two men fought over a bag of peanuts. The peanuts won.

Yo momma, she so fat, she needs to buy extra-large clothes.

An American man and a Chinese man have a conversation. The American man asks the Chinese man after a couple of minutes of speaking, "How long have you lived in the United States?" The Chinese man replies, "I moved to the United States when I was ten years old."

Knock Knock whose there your parents your parents who your parents just got malled by a hobo with an axe.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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