if u ever get arrested by cop, just tell the cop this: "No no officer, you got it all wrong. It was only a game. It's called RAPE."

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs hanging on the wall? Wally.

Why Americans are so bad at League of Legends? Because they can't defend their towers.

What do a baby and a slinky have in common? They both bring a smile to your face when you push then down a flight of stairs.

Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

Spongebob. "Hey Patrick, I thought of something funnier than 24." Patrick "Let me hear it." Spongebob "25"

Whats happening when you see your TV floating at night? You are probably suffering from some sort of mental disorder which causes spontaneous hallucinations and should seek medical help before the condition worsens.

What did the homosexual farmer say when he answered the phone? Hello

Why did the midget cross the road? He needed to buy a ladder

Dwarf Shortage

Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

An African-American is working on math problems and notices an Asian man walking by. The African American asked,"Could you help me out on these math problems?" The Asian man replied, " I have never been good at math."

How babies can you fit in a car seat? 1

A guy wanted to write a joke. He didn't.

Why was the doctor unable to perform his surgery properly? Because he forgot his scalpel

why couldnt the little boy watch two and a half men? because charlie sheen left and the other guy had surgeery and now has 2 penises

what do call a car full of people on the side of the road? a cool explosion waiting to happen

How do you know when your sister's on her period? Your dad's dick tastes like blood

Hello

Why was the girl unhappy with her male teacher? Because he gave her a bad grade...and raped her the night before.

You know what's funny about Fox news? Nothing. Lying to the public isn't funny at all.

Why did Jim go to the hospital? To get an autopsy.

Q. What did the Vampire say when he ate the Pizza? A. Nothing. It is literally impossible for a vampire to be real, therefore it's insane if you thought it said something.

http://www.pollsb.com/photos/o/355988-gay_marriage.jpg

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...