Q. What is a deaf man's favorite song? A. Nothing, because he can not hear.

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When life gives you melons you may be dyslexic.

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What is the difference between an apple and an apple? One has a brown spot.

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how do you stop a black man from drowning take your foot off his head

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Why wasn't the elephant allowed to the pajama party? Because he didnt have any pajamas.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was simply wandering around and happened to walk from one side of the road to the other.

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A black man walks into a bar in an all white neighborhood. He has a couple of drinks, pays for them, and politely calls a taxi for a ride home.

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A hill billy went fishing

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Tulips are red, As you can tell...a lot of blood has been spilt today.

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Friends are a lot like trees They fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe

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Q: What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the car? A: "Get in the car."

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Your mom is so fat, that i don't think she's attractive anymore.

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how do you kill chuck norris? you dont, killing is illegal

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why did the boat sink the captain drove it into a pile of sharp rocks

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What do you call a fat guy? A fata*s mothaf*cka

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What's worse; twelve babies in one trash can or one baby in twelve trash cans?

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A black man is running down the street with a purse in his hand. He was trying to catch up to the old woman who forgot it at the restaurant. She was very grateful.

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I'm gay Mr Goodwin

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Why did the chicken cross the road. Because most living organisms eventually cross some form path that is commonly known as a road. Roads are hard asphalt that is very good for cars and other wheeled road licensed vehicles.

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Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

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Jimmy comes home from school one day and goes to his mother. "Mommy, guess what?" "What?" "I had sex with my teacher today!" Naturally after hearing such news the mother gets appalled and tells her husband. "Well, that's my boy" he says "Now that your a man Jimmy we're going to go out and get some drinks tonight be ready in a half an hour." So they arrive at the local bar "Wait here son, you can sit down and save us a table and I'll go get the drinks ok?" "No dad I think I'll stand" "..why? What's the matter son?" "My butt hurts"

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speacking of cheese... steve jobs died

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A Priest a Rabbi and a duck walk into a bar. The rest of the patrons continue to drink until the situation seems less strange.

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Your parents shouldn't have met. I was thinking that as I contemplated suicide.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops