What has ears, but can't hear, eyes, but can't see, a mouth, but can't talk, and legs, but can't walk? A deaf and blind paraplegic with an improperly functioning larynx.

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A Muslim walks into a bar No-one survives the blast

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Why did the robot cross the road? Because It was bionically fused to the chicken.

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Roses are red Violets are blue There's suppose to be a fourth line.

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What happened when Johnny fell off of his bike? He suffered a very tragic and fatal brain hemorrhage resulting in a lower population by a minute percentile that is undetectable by the US Census.

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what is the difference between my girlfriend and my black pet bunny .... i raped my black pet bunny

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Whats worse than the holocaust A: not much

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Knock Knock. There was no answer.

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Your moma so ugly she should go see a plastic surgeon.

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Why was the man lying on the pavement? He was hit by a fridge

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One a upon of time there was man named Cinderella. He was so mad because his name was Cinderella. The end.

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Q: What's red and bad for your teeth? A: Bricks.

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What did Helen Keller name her dog? Phil.

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Look down at your keyboard. Notice that U and I are together? <3 Also notice that J and K are together too!:P

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Q: why do orphans always go hard? A: because the can never go home.

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What did the cat say to the rabbit? Nothing, cats are incapable of human speech as far as scientists are concerned. Also, the mouse was having a bad day. Rutabaga.

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autistic kids rock

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because the amount of times people reused this joke on this site made her so annoyed much she wanted to hurt herself.

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what do you get when you cross a jellyfish, a jar, and a brown crayon? i dont know, im not into genetics, and jars dont have genes.

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Whats worse than getting an "F" on a test? Stage diving with a kilt on.

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What is worse than finding dead parents? Not finding them.

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A priest enters a bar moments after a young teen walks into the same bar. The priest scolds the teen, warning him of the possibility of arrest, alcoholism, and other bad life consquences. The teen apologizes to the bartender, and much later in life, he thanks the priest.

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What's the difference between Paris Hilton and a cow? Cows are ruminants, meaning that they have a digestive system that allows use of otherwise indigestible foods by regurgitating and rechewing them as "cud". Paris Hilton, on the other hand, is a human being. Therefore, her stomach digests the bolus (masticated food) only after it has exited the oesophagus into the body of the organ, where it is digested into chyme and then passed through the pyloric sphincter into the duodenum.

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How does Lady Gaga like her meat? As a dress.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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