Why did the hippo drink the water? Because it was thirsty

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How do you drown a blonde? Intentionally attempting to drown anyone, regardless of their hair color, is murder which is illegal and morally wrong to do.

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What did little John do when he was bored? He went on Anti-Joke

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Knock Knock Who's There No-one your not very popular

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What do a porkchop and a watermelon have in common? They're both edible, organic, and delicious. Also, both are fun to throw at people.

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A man walks into a chiropractor. The chiropractor asked whats wrong with you? The man replies My boner has scoliosis.

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I've got a dig bick. You that read wrong. You also read the second sentence wrong.

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How do you beat Princess Diana in a car race? Challenge Princess Diana to a car race.

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Why'd the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was tired of this joke.

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot. You racist.

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What did the pregnant 16 year old get for her birthday? A miscarriage

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If you have 5 bucks and Chuck Norris has 5 buck you both have 5 bucks

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What do you call a girl who has slept with five guys? Her name.

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You: Did u hear the one about that guy walking into a bar? Them: No. You: He said it hurt

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in·fun·dib·u·lum? 1. a funnel-shaped organ or part. 2. a funnel-shaped extension of the hypothalamus connecting the pituitary gland to the base of the brain. 3. a space in the right ventricle at the base of the pulmonary artery.

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roses are red violets are blue start sucking my dick or ill kill you

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what would u di if u were having anal sex with a black guy and his dick was soooo bi that ir rippped ur asshole? staple it back together

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There is no I in team... But there is a u in suck. There is no I in team, but there is in awesome

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what do you call a mexican being baptized? a mexican becoming christian.

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A man is wrongfully convicted of murder and sent to prison. After a lengthy appeals process the guilty verdict is overturned and he walks away a free man.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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what is the opposite of underpants? overpants

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What the difference between a ferarri and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a pile of dead babies in my garage. That would be murder.

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How do you wake up lady gaga? Poke 'er face.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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