What do you call a boomerang that doesnt come back? A stick.

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A duck walks into a bar and asks for a beer. The bartender realizing this is an odd situation, seeing that ducks cannot articulate the English language, realizes he must be dreaming. He wakes up and turns to tell his wife about the dream, but she won't respond. He then realizes how his marriage is in shambles...

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What's worse than the holocaust? Dropping your biscuit in your cup of tea.

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Why did the mexican cross the street? Because the next lawn to mow was in a different neighborhood

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It's not ok to have intercourse with a woman who say's "No!" But what about "Let go of me!"?

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A duck walks into a bar. The bartender asks " What'll You Have" The duck doesn't respond because it's a duck.

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Knock Knock. You don't have a door.

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Variants: :) I will always assist you in whatever you want. :( I want to kill you all by myself! Sense? Non? Fuck? Mind? Fission Mailed? Impossible Mission.

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Im not random you just can't think as fa-bunnies

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Why can't Michael Jackson work at a boy scouts camp? Because he's dead.

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Why did Mary fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Mary.

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What did the orphan do on Mother's Day? He went to the cemetery

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My Penis is so big. How big is it? If you lay my penis down beside another similarly lengthy object, approximately 10" long, it would most likely surpass the length of the object you chose to measure it to.

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knock knock who's there? the paperboy the paperboy who? i lied, i'm a serial rapist, you should have looked through the peephole

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Why do elephant tusks stick out? For uprooting trees and bushes, and for defending their young.

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What did the horse say to the other horse? We are both horses

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What"s pink and fluffy? Pink fluff.

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Why didn't bob like night clubs? He was epileptic

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What time is it? 2:47 PM.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was trying to commit suicide through vehicular manslaughter and knew that the average human being would not be able to stop before it was too late.

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Did You Hear About That Mexican Who Went To College? no. Well plenty of them go to college every day. thats good to know.

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whats the stage after cancer? you die

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What do you call two Muslims flying an airplane? Pilots

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PPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEENNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN cil you have such a dirty mind

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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