There were three brothers. Big, Harry and Dick. They were walking along the road and were all instantly killed by a drunk driver. Their names were never mentioned and their story was used as a promotion for the seriousness of drunk driving and should not be taken lightly.

I have a black friend that recently went to the doctor for a full checkup. I saw him today, and he we was dressed to the nines in a very expensive suit. "What's with the suit," I asked. "My doctor told me I'm impotent! So I thought, if I'm going to be impotent, then it'll be harder to attract a long term mate without the ability to give her children someday. So I've decided to showcase my impeccable taste in style to make up for it." He seemed really bummed out, so I gave him a hug and we went and had some ice cream.

A used condom filled with water and left on a radiator makes an ideal and inexpensive lava lamp.

Whats fluffy, multicolored, and dances like a disco santaclaus? i don't know.

Yes

So my wife was in the kitchen, and I asked her to make me a sandwich. She agreed. I then volunteered to make her one. Lesbian relationships are amazing.

Lil Wayne

Jack and Jeff went up a hill to fetch a pail of water, They both turned gay, and had some sex, and now they have HIV

What's the difference between a hooker and an onion? You don't have to cook an onion to eat it.

How do you confuse an English Professor? Light your pants on fire and flop around like a fish.

Q: why did the white man buy a burge A: cuz he was hungry

Two guys fight over a girl. The girl gets up from under them.

A blonde takes a test. She scores higher than her Asian friend.

How do you stop a baby flying 100mph? a shovel

What's the difference between an airplane and a cantaloupe? What? Wow your a dumby head.

A man went to his doctor and said, "Doctor, every time I hit my hand with a hammer, it hurts!" Then both him and his doctor died; so it didn't matter.

Why was the boy afraid? Because he had just seen his dog get ran over by a tractor

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a man was cooking a tortilla. what did he say when he dropped it while flipping the tortilla? oops i dropped my tortilla

Whats the difference between Qantas and Malaysia Airlines? Qantas only looses money.

What's black and white and red all over? A black, white, and red shirt.

Knock Knock. Who's there? A cannibal. What? You are about to die and be eaten. Asshole! i will murder you first!

Why was the boy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

A paralyzed guy walks into a bar... Oh wait, he can't.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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