What did Marshawn Lynch say? Yeah

What do black people do with M&Ms? They eat them.

Why couldn't the 13 year old get into the pirate movie? He has cancer and is dying in the hospitable.

Past, present, and future walk into a bar. It was tense!

Why was the boy sad? Because a freak accident killed his mum his dad his best friend and he lost both his legs and is unable to feed himself

'Peter Piper picked a peck of pickled peppers.' That's fantastic because Peter Piper was paralyzed and the doctors said he would never be able tomove is arms or legs again, and there he is picking a peck of pickled peppers. I applaud you Peter Piper.

Why did Suzy fall of the swing? Because she had no arms!

Why did Timmy's face hurt? Because there was a frog stapled to it.

Two guys walk into a bar.... OUCH

12 in general

Mike: Hey Dave knock knock Dave: Come in!

What is small, yellowy-white and emits a kind of cheesy smell? A lump of cheese

A man walked into a bar making it immediately apparent that he had no future in competitive limbo.

Why was the black man unemployed and in debt? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his opportunities from a young age.

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She technically could have, she was physically able, but cars were not invented yet, and even if they were it is unethical for any humane person to let a blind and def person drive.

A priest, a rabbi, and a minister walk into a bar. The rabbi survives.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Go fuck yourself.

Yo mama so dumb she got hit by a bus and didn't know! The funeral was touching and sad. Everyone cried. 2 weeks later..........Johnson ended his own life.......

What did Michael Jackson say to the little boys before they came to his house? Get on the ferris wheel

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilate was a loaf of bread.

If life hands you lemons your probably hallucinating.

Roses are grey. Violets are grey. There is an entire spectrum of the world I am not privy to.

Roses are blue Violets are red Sugar are you And so is sweet

Why did the Mexican sneak across the US border? There aren't many good jobs for him in Mexico, and with the cost of living in his small village, he will be able to provide for his entire family of seven on just minimum wage in California. He will miss his family terribly while he is away from them, but he believes it is worth it in the end. Once he saves enough, he will pay the coyotes to smuggle the rest of his family over so they can be together again. Hopefully none of them will die on the journey.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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