What's red and looks like a bucket? A red bucket. What's blue and looks like a bucket? A red bucket in disguise.

What's white and horny? A unicorn

Roses are red Violets are blue I have cancer Nutella on muffin

What hurts more than a papercut? A chainsaw between your legs.

Roses are Red Violets are Blue No they're not They're purple

You know what rhymes with sloth? Rape.

A doctor tells a guy: "I have bad news. You have Alzheimer's, and you have cancer." Guy says, "Thank God I don't have cancer."

Why did the depressed man commit suicide? Its typical of a depressed person.

How does micheal Jackson know when it's bed time? When the big hand touches the little hand.

Two muffins are sitting in a oven, The other muffin says to the other muffin nothing, Because muffins are unable of human conversation.

Why couldn't the mother make her son's funeral? She died in a car crash on the way there.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Tulips are white and Pansies are pink.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Ok

Knock knock Who's there? Jehovah's Witness

Why is travis so funny? Trick question, He died of cancer 3 years ago.

what's the difference between a duck? one leg's the same.

A black guy and a Mexican are in a car, who's driving? The taxi driver.

i remember when i was a child i wanted a skateboard but my parents would never buy me one so late one night i crept downstairs and got a hammer and some wood and i beat them to death my foster parents baught me 5 skateboards

What did the plant say to the human. Nothing.

The man was so nice It's too bad he couldn't hear the bus coming.

Why did the fat girl stop eating? She wasn't hungry.

A clown attends a childs birthday party. He molests 4 children and kills the others. Then leaves.

why did nick kiss esther because he cheated

A my dog was a rappa. He recorded a hit. But it had no lyrics, because he is a dog.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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