What do you call a zebra with no stripes? A zebra with no stripes

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What do you call a guy who stabs cereal? A cereal killer.

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When I was in 4th grade, I was fat. The other kids would take my lunch and spit in all the food, then give it back. Teachers started to wonder why I wasn't eating, and soon began to ask me if I was anorexic. I replied, "do I look anorexic!?" I'm now 6 foot 3 and weigh 56 pounds. *FUN FACT: based on a heartwarming true story.

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A priest, a rabbi, and a minister walk into a bar. The rabbi survives.

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roses are red violets are blue i'm chinese and i don't know a joke pickle.

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Whats luckier than finding a lucky penny? winning the lottery.

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Why did the man walk into the bar Because he was an acoholic

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilate was a loaf of bread.

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What's the difference between Jam and Jelly? You can't Jelly your dick into your girlfriend's ass.

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Your momma is so old, she qualifies for multiple financial aid programs provided by the government.

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Knock Knock. Who's There? I don't know. I'm paralyzed.

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What do a plum and a small bunny have in common? There both purple except for the bunny.

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why did the girl have pink hair? because she died it purple, but it didn't work.

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What did the soldier get for his birthday? Shot in the face.

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An Irish man walks into a bar, and then realizes that he's walked into the wrong establishment (He was looking for an upscale restaurant.)

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What did one lawyer say to the other? We are both lawyers. What did the stupid lawyer say to the other lawyer? We are both pineapples.

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What's green and if you eat it you die? A Biljarts table.

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Knock knock who's there Betty Betty who?` ` my grandmother who passed away 2 years ago dont talk about her that was

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apple was gonna make a smaller ipod for kids but decided not to because they didnt want the name to be itouch kids.

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What did the boy in the wheelchair get for Christmas? A bicycle.

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What is yellow, has wheels and lies on its back? A school bus after a horrible traffic accident.

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whats worse than 4 dead monkeys? 5 dead monkeys.

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when chuck norris does a pushup, he is tearing the muscles in his biceps, deltoids, core, and triceps in order to make them stronger.

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Your momma's so fat: She fears a lower life expectancy and consequently not seeing her grandchildren grow up.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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