Q. what happend to the guy who walked by an alley in new york? A. he got beat up by a robber wich took hes money, cellphone, keys and his abillity to walk.

Dear Rubix Cube, DONE!! Sincerely, Colorblind

Why does Santa Clause not have any children? Because he only cums once a year.

Interviewer: Are you currently a smoker? Applicant: Are you implying that I look like a chimney?

Q: humpty dumpty sat on a wall A: yeah right

Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

really? are people insistantly so totally stupid? Now read that again and you may notice something. :P

Q: What's black and hangs from a tree? A: A tire swing.

What is the worst party ever? Nazi.

why did the clown fall of the swing? he got shot in the head

What's the different between jelly and jam? I can't jelly my penis up your butthole

A Muslim walks into a bar No-one survives the blast

I had a chocolate chip cookie today, thats it, just a chocolate chip cookie.

What did Jamie get for Christmas? Nothing. Jamie is not friends with Christmas.

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Q: What do you call a serial killer named Mark? A: Mark.

A rhinoceros walks into a bar. As it felt threatened by the presence of many humans, the rhino attacks and kills several people with the big horn on its nose.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get away from the tiger.

How many psychiatrists does it take to screw in a light-bulb? One, usually.

What did the alcoholic Indian do? Continued to drink and further worsen his people's stereotype.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because there were no cars in the way.

What do you get if you cross a kangaroo with a sheep? ProtestS from Anti GM activists.

Knock, knock. Who's there? Me, your friend George! You don't remember me! Oh. Sorry. I'm kidding. I'm a robber.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well it all began in 1807 when a 7 foot rooster gave birth to a chicken on the sidewalk while purchasing ice cream. Scientists have been intrigued so they went into study with it and won the Nobel prize. This somehow persuaded them to lure the chicken over to the other side by using a lollipop. They threw the lollipop as the chicken crossed the road, hit it in the eye, the chicken spazzed out, jumped in front of a car, teleported to London, and is now a gynecologist.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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