So I was flirting with a girl at a bar the other day when this huge black guy walks up and says "Hey honey". I realized that I still had some un-addressed prejudices in me as he shook my hand, pointed out that it was a mistake anyone could make, and introduced me to a girl he had met at the college he works at.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

There's a donut on a cruise ship and he goes up to the captain and he's like "hey captain can I drive the cruise ship" and the captain goes "nope, come back tomorrow" so the next day the donut goes up to the captain and says "hey captain can I drive the cruise ship" and the captain replies "nope, come back tomorrow" so the next day the donut goes up to the captain and he's like "hey captain can I drive the cruise ship" and the captain says "NO!" and throws him over board Theres a couple on the cruise ship and the man was going to have a romantic dinner with his girlfriend and propose. So he was showing his bestfriend (who was also on the cruise ship) the ring. But was he pulled it out the wind picked up and the ring fell over board. So the man was forced to have a romantic dinner with his girlfriend and couldn't propose. So they go to dinner and the both get crab. And when they open up the crab and guess what's in the crab?! Not the ring the donut!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -8

what do u call a Muslim flying a plane??? 9-11

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Nebraska the farmland its the only place for me!! I love the corn and the corn loves me!! I live for the corn and the corn lives for me!!

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did the little boy throw his clock out of the window? After hours of searching for the snooze button to no avail, the little boy became so irritated at the incessant ringing of the alarm that he threw it out of his window in a fit of rage. The clock landed on an old woman who was walking twenty stories below. She was immediately killed on impact.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Roses are red Violets are blue Faces like yours belong in the zoo But dont worrie ill be there Not in a cage But laughing at you

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Chip and Dale walk into a bar. Chip is black now.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What do the Africans have for breakfast? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did the girl stop running? Because she is in a wheelchair and will never walk again

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What does an Eagle and a Mole have in common? The are both of the kingdom Animalia, possessing many organ systems and cellular similarities. And they both live underground. Except for the Eagle.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Q:What did the slut have in her mouth? A: teeth.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What do you call a black man running really fast down a street? Active.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

If you don't see banners here, it doesn't mean they are not there...

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What did the spoon say to the other spoon? Nothing, it is a spoon.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

The word "Walter" is never funny.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because grass don't eat meat.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Q: Why did the little girl fall off the swing? A: Hahahaha! I can't read.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Who's mean and white and really not nice? Hitler

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What do you get when you cross an ugly hobo and a diabetic? Don't talk about your mom like that.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What did Tarzan shout when he saw the elephants coming? "Here come the elephants!"

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Who's the slut of the alphabet? C.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

"Doctor, Doctor, Help I feel like a pair of curtains" "I've got some cream for that".

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Yo mama's so fat, she had a lap-band procedure.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Q: Whats the best part of a bald pussy? A: After you put the diaper back on you perv!

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops