Q) What did the Irishman get for his birthday? A) Drunk

Why are a black man's eyes always bloodshot red after having sex? Pepper spray.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was trying to escape the evil villains in giant mech suits.

THAT AWKWARD MOMENT... nuff said

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where is my tractor?

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't, a car ran him over.

Simon: Knock Knock Alfredo: Who's there? Simon: Wire Alfredo: Wire Who SImon? Simon: Wire are you asking me this!!!!

What is the hottest day of the week? Wednesday

They say "You are what you eat." In that case, I'm a pussy.

Name three similarities between racism and sexism I, S and M

Why was Billy no mates? He had no friends.

What did the chicken say when it finally crossed the road? - nothing, its a chicken

Stripper went to strip club to ask for work. - It was closed

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, but it was delicious.

EVERYONE, CREATE LOVE NOT WAR.. Between Josh and Dylan... WILD.. PASSIONATE.. LOVE!

I like my coffee like my women. Without a penis.

roses are red, no one gives a shit, get back in the kitchen and bring me my chicken dips!

How does a person with Alzheimers' poem go? Roses are red, Roses are red, Roses are red, Wait, what was I doing?

what is black and green and rainy all over? the democratic republic of congo

Why did the kid fall off the bike? Because he was paraplegic.

How far can a baby fly? As far as you can throw it.

How many cats would it take to change a lightbulb? Cats can't change lightbulbs

Why did the pilot crash the plane? Because it wasn't a pilot it was a toaster.

What's worse than having cancer? Two people having cancer

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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