How do you get a blonde's number? You ask her, but she probably won't give it to a loser like you.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Who cares, it's a chicken.

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A: knock knock B: who's there A:come in B:come in who?

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A redhead and a blonde both go out to smoke a cigarette. They are both at risk of lung cancer.

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What's the difference between a black person and a pizza? Pizza is a type of food.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7 7 eight 9

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Three construction workers, an Italian guy, a Mexican guy, and a American guy are sitting on top of a building eating lunch. The Italian is tired of eating meatballs, the Mexican is eating a burrito, and the American is eating a cheeseburger. They are all fed up with eating the same lunch every day. The next day they all jump off the building for unrelated reasons. It is a tragedy and their families mourn the loss.

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How do you get rid of black people in your back yard? Politely ask them to leave.

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What happens when a baby stops crying? it dies.

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Three men are on a plane (note this is a low altitude plane) they're are going on they're 2nd grizzly bear hunting trip in Alaska. they crash into a mountain and all die. except the pilot. he left the wreckage and died from the freezing temperatures of an Alaskan winter.

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Birdie Birdie in the Sky, Left a message in my eye ... So I shot the little bitch

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What did the confused blonde girl ask to a nearby student? Nothing. She isn't supposed to chat because it's study hall and they enforce a strict "no talking" policy.

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a potato a chicken and a rooster ate a cat and you just wasted your time

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Why do dinosaurs have no friends? Because they are all dead

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Why was the little boy hit by a bus? I pushed him

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oh hai i'm al gore reduce ur carbon footprint lolz

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Why did the clown fall off the unicycle? Because I shot him in the face.

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In Soviet Russia, people commonly suffered under the might of the communist juggernaut. It was unpleasant.

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Why did the jew ask for $10 back after he lent a boy $2? Because of inflation

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What do an onion and a hamster have in common? They are both in my Grandma's omelette.

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What has 8 legs and makes women scream? .....Gang rape.

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What do you call a child that has been stabbed? A dead child

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What do you call a dog with no legs Nothing it won't come

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i once bought a timeshare, guess what happened? i'm broke

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops