what's body surfing? sounds dumb.

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No antijoke here.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms. Why couldn't she get up? She had no legs. Why did noone help her up? She was fat.

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roses are red, violets are blue, hes for me not for you, if by chance you take me place, ill take my fist, and smarsh your face.

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Did you hear about the guy that had his entire left side cut off? He's all right now. Dead but all right.

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Roses are red Violets are blue The other color on our flag is white I'm an American and rhyming doesn't matter

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what happened to the little girl when she crossed the line she was shot. shes mexican

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? A worm in your intestinal tract.

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what happens when you throw a green rock into a yellow pond. it makes a spash.

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Person 1: I need an adult.... Person 2: I am an adult. Person 1: I need another adult... Person 2: My friend's an adult too. Person 1: I need a third adult Person 2: GOD UR NEEDY!

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bob lost his camouflage bag. he never found it.

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What's another word for Manslaughter? My new Hobby

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What happens if a Muslim leaves their bag on a bus? They quickly return onto the bus and get it.

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Refridgerator.

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today in aa we were telling stories one of them was: that a girl put a wet cat (to dry it) in the oven

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Whats worse than failing an English test? finding out your now exgirlfriend has aids.

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How do you confuse a blond? Paint yourself green and throw forks at her.

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What do an airplane and a grape have in common? They both have wings, except the grape.

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What do you call a bird that can't fly? an ostrich

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Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

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There once lived a man in Peru. He lived in a small apartment then died of kidney failure.

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why did the plane crash? because the pilot was a tomato.

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What happens when your first name is Newton? You get nicknamed NEWT

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A Higgs Boson walks into a church, and the priest says, "We don't allow Higgs Boson's in here," and the Higgs Boson says, "But I thought Christianity promised acceptance to everyone who believes."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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