Where was the Decoration Of Independence Signed? At the bottom.

How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? It doesn't matter, the only chuck that matters is Chuck Norris.

why did the monkey fall out of the tree? because it was dead.

What did the bicycle say to the fat kid? Nothing, bikes cant talk.

whats worse than catching your parents having sex? having sex with your parents

There were 2 strawberries sitting in a bathtub One strawberry said "Hey can you please pass the soap? The other strawberry replies "WHAT DO YOU THINK I AM A TYPEWRITER??"

chickens, roads, horses, bars,roses, violets, sally, knock, knock, fnord

Why did the slut suck a dick? Because she's a slut.

Why didn't the boy get a bike for christmas? He broke the bath tub.

What's worse than getting an erection in church Getting an erection while naked in church

What did the little boy with a terminal illness get for Christmas? A gun

What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. I don't stalk him on normal days because that is both weird and illegal, thus I cannot come to a conclusion to what he does on opposite day. However, since he is lonely, I hypothesize that he must do something social, since the opposite on that is lonely.

If you don't see banners here, it doesn't mean they are not there...

Why was the blonde so dumb? She had a severe case of dyslexia, which made it difficult to study.

why couldn't the blind man hear? because he was also deaf.

Whats worse than losing your keys? Your entire family dying in a preventable house fire.

FOX News: Fair and balanced

What's green and gets you high? Marijuana.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because the monkey has a very weak cerrebellum.

an old lady walked into a bar, used the bathroom and left. THE END

Why is Barney green and purple? Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way

Knock knock *I need to either stop masturbating or answer the door* He's probably masturbating. *Who's there?* The other guy left. The end.

Roses are red violets are blue i have aids and now so do you

hey guys im gay

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...