A horse, a duck, a pig, and an arab walk into a bar. The horse ducks, the duck's hoarse, the pig's in a blanket, and the arab has a can, being surprised at how far a can can preach hate in Chicago. The bartender reminds the arab that he's with a swine, and the arab is offended for the poor horse.

knock knock. Who is there? You have. You have who? Your entire family in my basement.

Ian: Your Mama's so dumb, she tried to commit suicide off a sidewalk. Dan: Yea, and when that didn't work she hanged herself.

Hey I just met you, and this is crazy, but here's a free drink, you'll wake up in my basement.

Pretend you are in a box and there is no way out. How do you get out? You don't

Why doesn't Julius Caesar ever use a cell phone? Because he died in 44 BC.

Your Mom is so fat.... When she's goes to McDonald's and orders 3 Big Macs the people standing in line behind her all look at her with disgust and a tinge of pity.

Why did the mushroom go to the party? Cause he was invited.

Whats worst than finding half a worm in your apple? Getting rapped by a giant scorpian

What's green and invisible? This cabbage in my hand.

Why is sally sad her parents abuse her daily

What do you call a group of white males wearing hoods and setting fires? Cold

What's nappy,brown,intoxicated,and stealing my bike? A Blazed, black guy that stole my bike.

A blind man walked into a bar. Quite literally.

roses are red, violets are blue, if you want to success, stop being a mess..

Black, I dont know if you are kidding around or something, but I cant reach you on the phone pal, I am really sorry about the Valium, it was like only 10 milligrams pal, I mean please man, it was a joke, and Ill break up with Line anyways, I mean Alex and Petter are sorry too okay? Just take the phone, ill be there soon, I mean come on, you are the most cruel person I know, lets talk about it

Q: what do you call a much green circle that tastes good? A: An avocado

Doctor: I have good news and bad news. The good news is that your parents survived the car accident. Kid: And the bad news is? Doctor: I have a horrible sense of humor, they're both dead. I'm so sorry.

"Good Morning, I'm Dr. Pepper" "Like the drink?" "Huh... yes... just like the drink" Would you mind to sit right here Mr..... "Nike" "Oh, just like the shoes" "How do you dare!"

Your mum is so ugly that i make jokes about how ugly she is

The other day a male African American approached me in a less than reputable neighborhood after dark and inquired as to whether or not I had a dollar which I could spare. I politely told him I didn't and apologized. He forgave me and we went our seperate ways.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Why? To get to your house. Knock knock. Who's there? The chicken.

Whats the difference between a Ferrari and an erection? I dont have a Ferrari!!

If life gives you melons. You may be dyslexic.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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