How did Alice get revenge on Diane when Diane called her fat? When Alice was pregnant, she stabbed herself in the stomach and blamed it on Diane. Diane was then sent to prison for murder and received a sentence of 25 years. Alice laughed in court, and Diane was forced to commit suicide. Alice then stole Diane's husband, and she lived happily ever after.

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what do you call a black woman pregnant with twins? A woman who has a loving husband who she wanted to have children with so when they had sex, 2 of his sperm fertilized the egg so now she gets to raise two children which she is looking forward to, but she also knows it will be alot of work.

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Did you know that if you took all the elephants on earth and lined them up in space, that all the elephants would die???

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A Finnish guy and a Russian guy go into a sauna. The Russian died.

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What did one duck say to the other? "Quack" Ducks don't talk. But if it were to say something it would probably mention how it is concerned about the fact that the majority of people on the internet don't know what ducks say to each other.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue There's suppose to be a fourth line.

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A man walks into a bar. Ouch.

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whats the sad part of 4 negroes driving off a cliff? the car couldve fit 5

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? - Nothing This homeless man got a gift for his Birthday. What happened to the gift? - It got stolen the following day What did this homeless man get for New Year? - Still nothing Get real.

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What's did the lizard cross the road? Because he was stapled to the chicken.

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Chick Norris... Enough said

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swag

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Why did sally fall of of the swing she had no arms

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What did the duck say? Nothing. Everyone knows that ducks can't talk.

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding herpes in your apple.

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BOYS ARE DUMB AND THEY SMELL FUNNY AND IM ANGRY

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A man tells a blonde "you are what you eat" and she replies "well, i don't think I've eaten any sexy beasts today.'

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Rain rain go away, and don't come back or else i will kill your family.

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A squirrel walks up to a tree and says, "I forgot to store acorns for winter and now I am dead." It is funny because the squirrel gets dead.

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What did the black man say to the white man? Hey, I like your shirt.

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What did the Frog say to the other Frog? Nothing they can't speak

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What's the difference between a duck? Both legs are of equal length, especially the right.

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There's a cat, a dog, a rat and a goat... I don't know how the goat got in there?

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What happens if you accidentally say your best-male friend's name instead of your boyfriend's name during sex? Nothing, they're both named Adam.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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