'knock knock' 'Who's there?" "the mailman, Ive got mail for you"

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chickens, roads, horses, bars,roses, violets, sally, knock, knock, fnord

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What's worse than this That :(

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What did the cat say to the dog? Miaow. What did the dog say to the cat? Miaow.

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what did the black guy say to the white comedian? haha

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Why didn't the kid eat lunch at school? He wasn't hungry.

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Blonde: what does IDK stand for? Brunett: i don't know Blonde: NOBODY KNOWS!!!

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Why did the jew put a parking meter on his roof.? ....So santa would have to pay to park.

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Dollar ice tea... I drink that Supa hot fire... i spit that Two and a half men................... I watch that

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know.

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How do you get a Jew into a car? Tell him to get i the car.

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"My CiOCK is bigger!" "No! My CiOCK is bigger!": Two gamec.ock owners arguing over who has a bigger DiICK.

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Why was the gay man gay? Because he likes touching other guys penises

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Why did the elephant die? It was murdered by poachers for it's valuable ivory tusks.

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Do you know how to save a drowning laywer? Approach with caution as drowing victims can panic, thus pushing you under. If possible throw a floatation device rather than go in yourself, or hold out a stick and instruct them to grab one end while you pull them in with the other. If necessary perform CPR. Call an ambulance and monitor for hypothermia.

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Mom now that I am fourteen can I get a bra now? No Harold!

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what's worse, ten babies stapled to a tree or one baby stapled to ten trees?

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what do you call Tim Tebow on a bike with a clown hat on? Tim, Mr. Tebow whatever you want

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Far from, yet all organizations are money based and put capitalism in front of all, so if lets say, one organization, needs help from another, a money transaction is made, I play a role there, as a well... Diplomat, its not my title, but my title is something I cannot reveal to anyone, not even my wife, id be putting myself and people in danger, but since I master things such as hypnosis, I can well, influence people, this is how I can pull of favors myself. Not favors such as "kill that guy for me", but more like... In your case. "If you are going to kill the wizard, please let the rest be, I know they are good people"

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How do you kill Osama Bin Laden? Get The Navy Seals To Infiltrate his compound.

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. They then proceed to bake into tasty pastries which are then eaten for snacks or maybe a light breakfast.

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XD, You must really like me Nero, do you think people have problems telling us apart here?

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What did the T-Rex say to the caveman? Nothing. Tyrannosaurus Rex was a prehistoric land animal that roamed the Earth roughly 65 million years before the appearance of man. Making such a conversation impossible.

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Wife: "I suggest you check properly next time you lose your keys so that you find them quicker" Husband: "I suggest that next time I sit down and have a beer while I wait for Doc Martin and his time machine to give my keys back.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops