What's big, black, and impossible to swallow? A parking lot. Among many other things.

How do you put an elephant in a taxi? You open the door, make sure the elephant is seated confortably, and close the door.

What did boy with now arms and no legs get for christmas A pogo-stick

What do you call a school bus full of black people? A school bus

Charlie Sheen Walks Into a Rehab Center.....

Why was 6 afraid of 7? He wasn't: 9 was a dick.

Knock knock Who's there? Fuk Fuk who?

My Jimmy Saville advent calendar is rubbish. It only opens from 1 to 16.

What do you call someone that blows up a plane? Nothing you were on that plane

the WNBA.

What's the quickest way to a person's heart? A knife

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was an animal with a small brain and could not comprehend the situation.

What did the man dying of cancer want for his birthday? To live.

Whats pink and silver and runs into walls? A baby with forks in its eyes. Whats green and silver and sits in a corner? The same baby three weeks later.

Why did the man drive a van? So he could keep the stuff he stole.

Math Quiz! If sally was born on September 18th, 1997, how old will she be on her birthday? Leave your answers on her grave tomorrow.

Roses are red, Violets are dead, I've climbed through your window, I'm under your bed.

What do Native Indians and Asian Indians have in common? They're both human.

Why do the man leave his tv on? He was murdered while he was watching tv

How do you make a mime cry? Hit him with an axe

What's red and bad for your teeth A brick

Hey how is your wife and my kids

Fuzzy Wuzzy was bear, Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair, and died of cancer

Whats blue and smells like red paint? Blue paint.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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